#this show only has like 4 women and 1 of them is in a coma

[goreintake]

[standardquip]

Gungrave live reactions

for the entire series CW: sexism(?), racism(?), vulgar language, I am a 36 year old man who did not censor my thoughts as I was watching it. This took a little over a month and is just a compilation of discord messages I sent

gotta say the opening scene of the first ep is great I wish his name wasn't "Brandon Heat" though I'm sorry but that's a lame name Especially for an anime ok his anime name is "Beyond the Grave" Glad we got that established

I'm about 2/3 through the first ep and this is definitely a 90s anime 😂 (not that there's anything wrong with that)

gungrave ep 2 They named the black kid kenny I will be very surprised if kenny doesn't die this ep

someone died in ep2 It was not kenny I am genuinely shocked here's to ep3

kenny has finally died But so did a lot of other people RIP Kenny

It's going a lot harder (emotionally) than I was expecting, given the first ep I'm just starting ep4 now

so far my biggest problem with gungrave is that brandon seems like a mute character but he talks sometimes But the times he talks make no sense, they're not really that important So the whole decision to not talk a lot seems super awkward instead

yeah edgy teen show is definitely ep 1 and not any ep after that (so far) (I'm only on ep 4)

another thing that bugs me is all the pans are weirdly fast but the mute/not actually thing brandon does bugs me way more than the pans

ep6 I like harry more than brandon didn't anticipate that

oh god the audio delay on this ep is horrible I hope it's just this one ep and not the rest of them

ep11 of gungrave bold strategy, cotton.gif let's see if it pays off it only worked out because of plot armor

ep12 of gungrave Brandon got a hair cut and looks like a real yakuza now

… I hate it

gungrave ep14 normally I don't care about fictitious relationships or how problematic they are but maria has convinced herself she loves her grandfather, who raised her, because brandon broke up with her and orchestrated a perfect moment And now she's pregnant by her grandfather and like this is scummy in so many different ways but mostly I just feel kinda 😩 about what it says about maria's intelligence in fact all the women in this series (actually now that I think about it, there is literally ONLY TWO) are just really fucking dumb

ep14 has some real beautiful compositional symbolism (unsure if that's the accurate term) Harry wears white and brandon wears black harry is in the shadow and brandon isn't harry tries to get brandon to betray the family and of course brandon won't. He goes to shoot harry. But doesn't and starts crying the gun lands precisely in the middle. Implying brandon's thinking about it? Or maybe it's just for symmetry. idk

this scene really slaps you over the head with symbolism. I don't care. I'm a fan

damn this show took a fucking turn

oh good just in time for Harry's break down ep15 is where the grey haired brandon comes in!

Maria is the dumbest bitch ever "I just found out brandon is alive! Oh I didn't see him myself. An aide of mine said they talked to him" Maria: Cries from happiness "Oh just knowing he's alive is enough!" bitch please supernatural stuff isn't known in this canon do you just believe everything you're told? wtf This is some pregnancy psychosis shit

damn you think Harry went crazy with power but he really went crazy with power

damn what's in this suitcase that makes it weigh so much ep18 brandon finally comes out of a coma

ep18 is where ep1 left off

while watching gungrave I had some fever memory recollection of an anime called Heat Guy J So I looked it up It seems to be a combination of robocop and minority report?? Also it has a werewolf apparently

ep22 of gungrave I think I can fit this in before I need to leave this is totally gonna end with mika, who is like 17, dating brandon/grave if it doesn't, I'm gonna be surprised so all three women in this show will get with dramatically older guys and also be stupid idiots

hm ok brandon/grave only has 10 days of life left unless they magically come up with a different way to make him live so there's 2 eps to figure that out and/or have sex we'll seeeeeeeeeee oh, 4 eps actually Whatever anyway I'm out for a few hours to the family function

gonna attempt to finish gungrave I'm starting ep 23 of 26 gonna play them at 1.5x normal speed good mika (16ish) professes her love for grave (40+, died once) and grave is like "I'll be your guardian and protect you but that's all" Good We don't need yet another pedo relationship in this anime

ep24 "promise me you won't die before me" the girl who married a guy 30 years her senior says 🙄 oh I guess this was foreshadowing She got shot and died

grave is literally falling apart like bad pottery ep25

lmao harry, the guy who has no issues murdering literally anybody, swerved to avoid a cat in the road

the crash from the cat was so bad his whole life flashed before his eyes. This ep was a huge flashback oh grave's hair is white instead of grey now I guess because he's almost dead… again ep26 Last one

it's over they killed eachother

[mint-moon25]

STUNNING - IN - WHITE - WHAT

A - SPLENDID - BEAUTY SIMPLY

GORGEOUS - TIMELESS - TRULY

SPECTACULAR - THRIFT - TRUE

TREASURES - OR - ANTIQUES

HANDED - DOWN - SIMPLE - IS

BEAUTIFUL - AMENDMENT - 1

GRIEVANCES - MUST - B - YES

GIVEN - 2 - THE - USA - GOV'T

NOT - LOCAL - STATE - GOV'T

YOUR - PROBLEM - GIVER YES

WELL - WE - ALL - KNOW - THE

CHANCE OF - YOUR AUDIENCE

2 - PRESIDENT - BIDEN - $$$$$

GETS - U - FASTER - WITH - HIS

MAJESTY - THE - KING - IS - HIS

FAMOUS - GARDEN - PARTIES

LONDON - ENGLAND - WEAR'G

A - HAT - THAN - MEETING AND

TALKING - 2 - PRESIDENT BIDEN

DEMOCRAT OLDEST PRESIDENT

IN - US - HISTORY - THUS - WHAT

2 - DO - MY - SUGGESTION

BIBLE - 'MONEY - ANSWERS ALL'

WE - CONTACT - HARVARD LAW

THEIR - LAWYERS - 2 - CHANGE

LAW - THEY - IN - 'HOW - A BILL

BECOMES - A - LAW' - OR TRUE

LEGAL - PERMITS - LEGAL

PERMISSION - OUR - ONLY

CHANCE - B 4 - WE - CRY 2

LOVE - ABOVE - CLASSIC

BEAUTY - DO - U - WANT

KOREAN - GIRLS - WHAT - DO

FOREIGNERS - DO IN FLORIDA

DEAR - HARVARD - LAW -

BIBLE - 'LIKE - LAMBS - 2 - A

SLAUGHTER' - BLK WOMEN

WHERE - GOING - 2 - KISS MY

MOUTH - WHILE - STABBING

ME - WITH - KNIFE - 2 STEAL

MY - LUGGAGE - THINGS - AS

THEY - TOUCH - MY - BODY 4

BLKS LIKE - SIGHT OF BLOOD

FRONT - OF - MAIN - LIBRARY

THAT - HAS - MIAMI - POLICE

BLKS - WERE - STALKING ME

4 - WEEKS - THEN - LESBIAN

ATTACK - AS - THEY - WERE

SALIVA - WANTING - 2 LICK

MY - MOUTH - STAB - STAB

STAB - BY - BLK - FEMALE

MOB - 2 - STEAL MY THINGS

AS - THEY - ENTER - MAIN FL

LIBRARY - WITH - MY THINGS

AT - 9:30A EDT - WHILE - ME

FACE - DOWN - STABBED YES

MANY - TIMES - 2 - STEAL MY

LUGGAGE - THINGS - WHILE

THEY - TOUCHED MY - BODY

SUCKING - MY - MOUTH FOR

BLKS - HISPANICS - WATCH

BEAUTY - PAGEANTS - AND

THEY - SHOW - THEIR LUST

AT - THE - COUNTRIES WHO

WIN - ALL - THE - TIME AS 2

USA - ADVERTISES - THEY

ALLOW - FOREIGNERS - AS 2

WHY - 2 - KILL - THEM - GET

BODY - PARTS - HEART - FR

COMA - $35,000 - KIDNEY

BLADDER - $9,000 - EACH

HUD - SECTION 8 - DOESN'T

ALLOW - 21 AND OLDER - TO

HAVE - ALCOHOL - 2 - GET A

PERFECT - KIDNEY BLADDER

LANDLORDS - PROPERTY YES

MANAGERS - HAVE MURDERED

MANY - FOREIGNERS THROUGH

THE - YEARS - 50 STATES - USA

DEAR - HARVARD - LAW -

MIAMI - POLICE

BLK - MEN - AND - WOMEN

AMERICANS

HAITI - BLKS

CUBAN - BLKS - FR - CUBA

UNIVERSAL - ALLIED - YES

SECURITY - HAITI - BLK MEN

WOMEN - SECURTY - OF YES

BRICKELL - CITY - CENTRE

OUTDOOR - SHOPPING MALL

BRUNETTE - WOMAN - WHO

CHARLES MANSEN - USED 2

MURDER - BLONDES - 7 MON

MONTH - PREGNANT - JUST

BRUNETTES - THEIR - BROWN

HAIR - HIDDEN - CAMERAS FL

EVERYWHERE - $1 BILLION US

MALL - SHODY - WORK - THEIR

INTERMIX - BLOUSE - OVER HAI

$2,000 - COTTON

HEAD - OF - SECURITY - ALLIED

UNIVERSAL - SECURITY - OPEN

CARRY - WHEN - FLORIDA - NOT

ALLOWED - OPEN - CARRY - ALL

THEIR - BLKS - FROM - HAITI

EXCEEDED - IMIGRATION YES

QUOTA - ILLEGALLY - IN 1 CITY

IMMITATING - KOREANS BORN

IN - USA - AND - PHILIPPINS FR

LICENSED - REGISTERED NURSES

LICENSED - DOCTORS - LICENSE

RESTAURANT - OWNERS - ALSO

PHILIPPINE - FOOD - STORES ALL

LICENSED - HAITI - ALL - ILLEGAL

OPEN - CARRY

SECURITY - ALL - OF - THEM

NOT - DOCTORS - NURSES OR

CAFE - OR - FOOD - STORE

OWNERS - NOT TEACHERS

JUST - MIAMI - POLICE - OPEN

CARRY - MIAMI - SECURITY TO

SHOOT - FOREIGNERS

SHOOT - CHILDREN

ALL - ABOVE - SAYS

14TH - AMENDMENT - A JOKE

ARCHAIC - ONLY - PRESIDENT

UPHOLDS - NOT - JUDGES OR

PRESERVES - SECURES - FOR

35 AND OLDER

14 YRS - RESIDENT

WHAT - A - JOKE - EVERY - YES

SEPT - OCT - KIDS - IN THE USA

TAKEN - SHOT - 2 - DEATH -YES

STABBED - 2 - DEATH

DEAR - HARVARD - LAW

SIR - PATRICK HENRY - STILL

MEN - CRY - PEACE - PEACE

INSPITE - OF - ABOVE THUS

NOT - WORTH - LISTENING 2

2ND - AMENDMENT - FANS

LOCAL POLICE - SHOT 2 DEATH

'IN - GOD - WE - TRUST'

MORE - AND - MORE

HARVARD - LAWYERS

$500 - PER - HOUR - 2 - MAKE

CHANGES - WHY MINIMUM FL

WAGE - SMALL - SO - ALL ARE

MURDERED - SLAUGHTERED

B 4 - THAT - HAPPENS - LIKE

HONORABLES - NEED -

EVIDENCE - 4 - BLUDGEONING

KINKY - JUDGES - WANT - YES

NETFLIX - VIDEO - SO - BIBLE

DEPART - FR - EVIL - WE'RE

CLOSING - ALL - COURTHOUSES

RELEASE - OF - $500 BILLION IN

TAXES - WILL - GO - 2 - EBT - YES

FOOD - STAMPS - ELECTRONIC

BENEFIT - TRANSFER - BUT YES

UNDER - NEW - MANAGEMENT

NO - LONGER - BASED - ON YES

INCOME - EXAMPLE

FIRED - QUALIFIED - EVEN - IF

THEY - RECEIVE - $5 MILLION

PER - YEAR - CHEERLEADERS

MANY - RICH - KILL - TRUE

THEMSELVES - FAST - FOR

EMBARASSED - HUGE BILLS

NO - LONGER - CAN B - PAID

PRICES - INCREASING

HOUSES - APTS - PENTHOUSE

DRAMATIC - PRICES - ALSO - 4

POLITICIANS - NEED - HIGHER

SALARY - POLICE - IN CHARGE

POLICE - COMMISSIONERS

OVER - $250,000 - EA YEAR

THERE - IS A - WAY - 2 STOP

THIS - AND - HOW - 2 - STOP

SUICIDES - WIDOWS - NOW

MARRIED - 2 - ANYONE - 2

AVOID - HOMELESS - YES

HARRASSMENT - FR - ALL

DEAR - HARVARD - LAW

I - HAVE - 2 - PROGRAMS

IN - MIND - BUYING - APTS

PENTHOUSES - GATED YES

COMMUNITY - HOUSES AND

BUILDINGS - BUYING - THEM

2 - SELL BACK - 4 - $1 - EACH

THEN - TAXES - OF - $1 ONLY

RESIDENTIAL - PROPERTY

TAXES - JUST - COINS YES

2ND - PROGRAM - IS ALSO

WHAT - TEXAS - FLORIDA

CALIFORNIA - IGNORES 2

WHAT - BLOCKS - HURRICANES

MOSO - BAMBOO - PLANT TRUE

CALLED - KING - OF - BAMBOOS

MASSIVE - ROOTS - ABSORBS

FLOODING - SAW - FRONT OF

ME - BLOCKS - 300 MPH - YES

WINDS - BLOCKS - NOISE AND

ONLY - PLANT - THAT ENRICH

LAND - SWEET - ORGANIC YES

APPLES - ABSORBS - ALL HAI

POLLUTANTS - ABSORBS YES

CARBON - DIOXIDE - CARBON

POISONING - SHOULD - BE IN

EVERY - HOSPITAL - ROOM

BUT - NEVER - DONE - AS IT

IS - CHEAP - AND - FR - YES

SOUTHERN - CHINA - GREEN

BEAUTY - EASY - 2 - PLANT &

MAINTAIN - 3 FEET - DAILY &

MAX - 75 FEET - U - CAN CUT

ABOVE - AND - HAVE - THEIR

BAMBOO - 4 - FURNITURE - &

KITCHENWARE - BEAUTY YES

PRODUCTS - LIKE - HAIRBRUSH

GROWS - BACK - 2 - 75 FEET SO

NEVER - ENDING - BUSINESS ITS

FREE - ALL - THE - TIME - TRUE

I - WANT - PERMISSION - 2 YES

START - A - HOMELESS - TRUE

PROGRAM - USA - WORLDWIDE

WHERE - I - AM - THEY'VE BEEN

TRYING - 2 - GET - RID - OF THE

HOMELESS - WITH - TENT FOR

OVER - 7 YRS - IN - LESS - THAN

5 YRS - OPEN - CARRY - MIAMI

SANITATION - WILL - HAVE DUE

PROCESS - OF - LAW - MIAMI

POLICE - BOTH - SHOOTING

HOMELESS - GETTING THEIR

KIDNEY - BLADDER - THEN

BURNING - BODIES - TROWING

AWAY - THEIR - THINGS - 2 YES

CLEAN - THE - STREETS - THAT

TAXES - PAID - 4 - SO - THESE

HOMELESS - PART - OF - THE

$$$ - IT - TOOK - 2 - BUILD THE

SIDEWALKS - I - HAVE - TRUE

PROPOSAL - LIKE - PODS - OF

SELF - MOVING - ONCE - YOU

PUT - YOUR - STUFF - ITS YES

PICKED UP - THEN - U DON'T

HAVE - 2 - WORRY - ABOUT

WORK - 2 - PUT - INSIDE THEN

DRIVING - 2 A - STORAGE YES

PLACE - HARD - AND - TRULY

EMOTIONAL - ALSO - AS THEY

2 HAVE - KILLED THEMSELVES

AFTER - THEY - LET - THEIR YES

LITTLE - MONEY - PAY - AUTO

PAY - BUT - HARVARD - LAW

CENTRAL - PARK - TOWER

PENTHOUSE - $250 MILLION

TALLEST - BLDG - IN WORLD

HOW - MUCH - IS - PROPERTY

TAX - 2 - PAY - 4 - GARBAGE

SCHOOLS - LIBRARY STREETS

EVERYTHING - WHY - SHOULD

1 - PERSON - HAVE - THAT BILL

EVERY - YEAR - NO - YEAR CAN

THEY - PAY - PARTIALL - ITS YES

RETURNED - BY - THE - OFFICE

ALSO - PAID - BY - TAXES - BY

BUYING - ALL - IN - FLORIDA

SELLING - AT - $1 - THIS YES

OFFICE - ONLY - 2 - PEOPLE

IN - FUTURE - SO - I - HAVE AN

IDEA - NEED - LEGAL - PERMIT

MIAMI - FLORIDA

DEADLY - HURRICANES

01 JUNE - UNTIL 30 NOV

YET - MIAMI - POLICE

HAITI - BLK - MEN - WOMEN

BOTH - OPEN - CARRY WANT

ALL - 2 - SLEEP - ON STREET

LAUGHING - TARP - 2 - COVER

THEM - DURING - 100 MPH

WINDS - HURRICANE PATRICK

CALVIN - 120 MPH - HAWAII HI

200 MPH - CAN - HAPPEN YES

AGAIN - WINDS - IN - FLORIDA

POLITICIANS - MIAMI POLICE

SECURITY - LAUGH - AT - ALL

DEAD - BODIES - KIDNEY AND

BLADDER - AVAILABLE - YES

EVERYWHERE - PHILIPPINES

HAD - BAD - HURRICANE AND

KILLED - OVER - 800,000 YES

MIAMI - ONLY - OVER 400,000

PEOPLE - THUS - I - HAVE - YES

SUGGESTION - HARVARD - LAW

I'M - UNEMPLYED

USC - 1 YEAR - LESS - THAN

$75,000 - PAID - AT - AGE 16

COMPUTER - SCIENCE - YES

PROGRAMMING - W - PASCAL

PAID - IN - FULL - GRANTS TOO

UNEMPLOYED - BECAUSE - OF

MY - EDUCATION - ESPECIALLY

50 STATES - MANAGERS NEVER

WENT - 2 - COLLEGE - WERE US

ALREADY - WORKING - DURING

HIGH SCHOOL - 50 STATES USA

I - RECEIVE - SSI - 4 - BLINDNESS

$914 - YET - MIAMI - MIN - WAGE

$1,600 - TAX FREE - JUST - THAT

EVEN - HILTON - TURNED - ME

DOWN - TARGET - WALMART

HAAGEN-DAZS - PAPPA JOHN's

THEY - ALL - TURNED - ME YES

DOWN - EASY - 2 - FIRE ALL OF

US - TAGALOG - MEANS - NADA

NOTHING - 2 - THEM - HISPANICS

BLKS - FIRED - UNEMPLYED YES

EVICTED - REPOSSESSED MORE

TOLD - 2 - SHRED - NATURALIZTN

CERTIFICATE - NOT - ACCEPTED

BY AT&T - AMERICAN TELEPONO

BEGGING - WHAT - I - HAD - 2 DO

WITH - STORAGE - BUT - MIGHT

B - EVICTED - AGAIN - BY - YES

HISPANICS - BUT - USA - GLAD

2 C - HOMELESS - FLORIDA AND

TEXAS - DEADLY - HURRICANES

I - HAVE SUGGESTION

LEGAL - PERMISSION

TOKYO - MALE - SCIENTISTS

THEIR - CREATION - LIKE YES

PODS - WILL - B - SEEN ALSO

IN - TOKYO - SEOUL - MAKATI

MANILA - MIAMI - OTHER YES

CITIES - OF - FLORIDA - TEXAS

WILL - HAVE - BATTERTED YES

WIVES - AND - KIDS - JUST HAI

WIVES - ESCAPE - FASTER

DEAR - HARVARD - LAW

CONTINUING - IN NEXT POST

[mint-moon25]

DEAR - KOREAN - GIRLS - OF - SEOUL,

AS - U - KNOW - MY - FUTURE - NAME

WILL - BE - CAILEY JAMES - CJ - YES

THE - JAMES - FAMILY

MEETING - KINGS - AGAIN

KING CHARLES III

KING - OF - ROYAL - THAILAND

ALSO - MEETING - AGAIN

IMPERIAL HIGHNESS - OF - JAPAN

PRINCE ALBERT - OF - MONACO

ALSO - MEETING

CURRENT - POPE - OF - VATICAN CITY

PERKS - OF - FORMER

CHILDREN's - ROYAL - BALLET

MET - ALL - ABOVE

AS - RELATIVE - OF - PRESIDENT - PUTIN

OF - RUSSIAN - FEDERATION

BORN - WITH - HIS - EYES - BLUE - SAME

EYES AS - 2ND PRINCE - LAST MONARCH

OF - ALL - OF - FRANCE - KING LOUIS

AS - TEEN - LOOKED - LIKE - WITHOUT

FRECKLES - THE - QUEEN OF SCOTTS

QUEEN - OF - SCOTLAND

FR - SON - OR RELATIVES

BEHEADED - ORDER OF - SKIN PROBLEM

QUEEN - OF - ENGLAND - WHITE - ROYAL

AS - CHILD - LOOKED - LIKE

SHIRLEY TEMPLE

GROWING - UP - GRANTED - AS - TEEN

SHIRLEY TEMPLE - AGAIN

WENT - 2 - EDINBURGH - SCOTLAND

WENT - 2 - HIGHLANDS - OF - SCOTLAND

THEY - BOWED - 2 - ME - DIDN'T - KNOW

WHY - OF - COURSE - SHOWED - ME HER

PAINTINGS - AND - SAW - WE'RE - TWINS

ENJOYED - MYSELF

BUT - LIFE - IN - PHILIPPINES - IN - USA

MURDEROUS - FR - HISPANICS - WHITES

WHITE - HISPANICS - AND - BLKS - ALSO

MURDEROUS - FR - PHILIPPINES - BY TEL

TELEPHONE - ALSO - MURDEROUS - FR

SCOTLAND - YARD - LIFE - AND - DEATH

NON-COLLEGE - GRADS - WHITE WOMEN

NON-VIRGINS - OF - LONDON - ENGLAND

SUCH - A - SMALL - PLACE

REMOVED - OF - SCOTLAND THE FUTURE

INDIA - BOYS - TOLD - ME - 2 - CALL - TEL

OF - SCOTLAND - YARD - THEIR - POLICE

THOSE - PEOPLE - NOT - ALLOWED GUNS

NOW - MEN - SPECIAL - POLICE - WITH

FIREARMS - SO - QUEEN - OF - UK - THEIR

MONARCH - HER - LAST - WAS - IN - THE

CASTLE - OF - SCOTLAND

SCOTLAND YARD - WOMEN - OF - LONDON

ENGLAND - ATTACKED - ME - BY - TEL AND

KEPT - YELLING - AT - ME - 4 - I - SAID - WAS

BORN - IN - PHILIPPINES - CALLING - LONG

DISTANCE - JUST - LIKE - THE - ENGLISH

THREW - HARD BREAD - AT - JUDY GARLAND

DINNER - THEATER - CALLED - HE - A DRUNK

HAS - BEEN - CAN'T - SING - WRINKLED

PRUNE - BAG - LOST - GIG - INCLUDING

HOTEL - LISA MINNELI - DIDN'T - WANT

HER - NO ONE - DID - HER - INSURANCE

RARE - INCLUDED - SUICIDE - SO - THE

SLEEPING - PILLS - PSYCHIATRIC MEDS

DIET - PILLS - SUPPLIED - BY - STUDIOS

OF - PAST - HOLLYWOOD - FILMS - AS

WITH - ALCOHOL - LIKE - MARILYN MONROE

BOTH - COMMITTED - SUICIDE - THESE PILLS

AND - ALCOHOL - MONROE - BARBITUATES

AS - THEY - ENDED - THEIR - LIVES

JUDY GARLAND

HER - BOY - AND - GIRL - KIDS

LISA MINNELI

ALL - 3 - RECEIVED - $1 MILLION - EACH

BENEFICIARY

SO - FORMER - CASE - WORKER

HISPANIC - ELENA QUIROS

NEW HORIZONS - LMHC - MENTALS

FOR - THEIR - HUDS - IN - MIAMI FL

01 OCT - ARRESTS - 4 - THE - HOMELESS

ILLEGAL - BILL - ILLEGAL - LAW

REPUBLICAN - PART - OF - FLORIDA

GOVERNOR - NOT - ALLOWED - 2 - CALL

THEM - HOMELESS - AS - FR - VOTING A

SALARIED - POLITICIAN - MORE - THAN

DOUBLE - MINIMUM - WAGE

THEY - ARE - NOT - ALLOWED - 2 B YES

CALLED - 'POOR' - EITHER - BUT - THEY

ARE - CITIZENS - OF - THE - UNITED

STATES - THE - RESIDENTS - OF MIAMI

FLORIDA - RESIDENTS - MUST - B - YES

ADDRESSED - FOR - THE - KILL - SHELTERS

DOMESTIC - TRANQUILITY - 14TH

'WITH - DUE - PROCESS - OF - LAW' - WHAT

THEY - DO - 2 - CATS - DOGS - 50 STATES IS

LEGAL - 4 - HUMANS - POOR - HOMELESS

1 MIN - ODORLESS - GAS - THEN - DEAD &

KIDNEY - BLADDER - $9,000 - EACH - FOR

THE - WORTH - OF - AMERICANS - THEIR

BODY - PARTS - FR - RUN - OVER - BY CAR

OR - BIKE - IN - HOSPITAL - COMA - THEN

THEIR - HEART - $35,000 - OUR - WORTH

SO - TODAY - FR - YANDEX - MAIL - THE

ONLY - ONE - ALLOWED - ME - WITHOUT

TEL - NO - ENTRY - MAIN - LIBRARY

DESKTOP - DELL - COMPUTERS

TODAY - MY - LEASE - STATED - STARTS

ON - WHAT - ELENA - SAID - LAST - DAY

MONDAY - 30 SEPT 2024

WHEN - I - WAS - APPROVED - AUGUST

JESSICA - BLK - FEMALE - ILLEGAL YES

PROPERTY - MANAGEMENT - 2 BUILDINGS

LOW - INCOME

ONE - SPANISH - SPEAKING - MAINTENANCE

ONLY - ONE - MANNING - HER - OFFICE

WHEN - NOT - THERE - WHICH IS - ALWAYS

LAW - STATES - MINIMUM - WAGE

1 MUST - BE - THERE - AND - PART - TIME

DURING - 30 MIN - LUNCH

8A - 4P

MAINTENANCE - CAN'T - B - ALONE

AND - WORKING - DAILY - ILLEGAL

WORK - HOURS

MIAMI - ILLEGAL - WORK - DAYS AND

WORK - HOURS - ILLEGAL - ONLY

SPANISH - SPOKEN - BY - MAINTENANCE

SPANISH - SPOKEN - BY - STAFF - IN - FL

FLORIDA - WANTS - 2 B - SPANISH - COLONY

AND - US STATE - 2 - GET - MONEY FR THEIR

WORLD - 3RD - POP

OVER - 333 MILLION - AND - MORE - FEMALES

SO - HAVE - 2 - GO - 2 - BUILDING

2 - GET - LEASED - SIGNED - AND - WHEN - ME

PAYING - I - WAS - PROMISED

ONE - MONTH - THEY - PAY - THEN - NEXT

MONTH - I - PAY - 33% - THAT's - $311.19

SO - CITY - OF - MIAMI - AGAIN - ROBBED

ME - MY - PAYMENT - BEGINS - ILLEGALLY

IN - OCTOBER - ROBBERS - THIEVES - YES

ACTIVE - BUILDING

APP - ALSO - PAY - RENT

VISA - MASTERCARD - DISCOVER - AMEX

labre place shepherds court active building . com

GOT - PLACE - AFTER - ALL

2ND FLOOR - LAST - BALCONY - ON - OUTSIDE

BLACK - BALCONY - EVENT - OF - FIRE

JESUS - IS - LORD

GOING - SOON - 2 - GET - LEASE - SIGNED

SHE - MIGHT - BE - THERE - LABRE PLACE

12 MIN - WALKING - FR - MAIN - LIBRARY 2

[joskippy]

!!! ARCHIVIST MARTIN HEADCANONS PLS !!!

OHOHOH FELLA YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH HCS I HAVE FOR THIS AU

Literally all of this is going under a read more because I have this entire au mapped out in detail but basically I find the idea of Archivist!Martin very interesting because it's just changing one detail of the entire podcast and it completely alters the story.

(Under the read more is basically my entire idea for this au from season one to season four)

What happens in this au is that Elias hires and appoints Martin as head archivist because of the fact he was already deeply alligned with the lonely and was a interests of the webs. He lacked any real connection outside of the archives and was already of interest of two entities, he's basically a perfect candidate to become archivist. Tim, Sasha, and especially Jon are hesitant to be working under someone who they don't know and hold a slight grudge against Martin at the start for being obviously unqualifed for his job. Tim and Sasha, of course, immediately become more understanding when finding out about Martin's cv and just assuming he got unlucky and winded up with the role as the head archivist. Jon, on the other hand, still doesn't know about Martin's cv and continues holding the grudge against Martin.

Which leads us to season 1

In season one, Jon's opinion on Martin is "Oh lord this man I don't know is obviously unqualifed for his job and the role of archivist should've gone to my friend Sasha. I don't like this man but he is my boss so I will keep my mouth shut." Jon though, is still very passive agressive to Martin but is less of an ass to him in this au. Martin is very open about his opinion on statements and believes alot of them but similar to jon, will only record the ones that he knows have to be real. I still think Martin get's trapped in his flat by prentiss in this au, wanting to get more info for the case but not wanting to inconvenience any of his co-workers. While trapped in his flat, Jon takes over for him and records statements for Martin (Not in a "I want to impress my boss" matter but more of an "I'll show this twerp how it's really done") and realizes how much of toll it takes on him and how difficult the job is. When Martin comes back from his little worm adventure, Jon is much more nicer and understanding of him. Martin records what happened with him and prentiss and Jon offers him to stay in the little room he made for when he overstays at work. (Martin of course, is not happy with the fact Jon stays past work hours finishing up stuff but that doesnt matter). Y'know how the rest of s1 goes with the prentiss attack (Jon and Martin still share the heart to heart, Jon loses him and Tim in the tunnels) Jon finds Gertrude's body and it sparks his paranoia finding out she was shot to death and then we get to

Season 2

Jon's immediate assumption is that Martin killed Gertrude to get his job because like, he still doesn't know Martin well and then finds out this dude's predecessor got murdered so of course mr jon sims is going to go "oh so Martin for SURE murdered this lady." For the first half of the season, Jon pretends to be buddy buddy with Martin to see if anything's off with him and somewhere along the line Jon finds the noted Martin was writing to his mom in the trash and immediately assumes its about the murder. He catches Martin in his office and immediately corners Martin like "HEY I KNOW YOU KILLED GERTRUDE AND I GOT THE PROOF" and Martin just sighs and tells him about his cv and mother and Jon's opinion of Martin goes from "incompetent murderer who killed his predecessor to get his job and might kill me." to "highschool drop out whos just trying to make a living might end up being murdered too". With the not-sasha stuff it's sorta the same but Martin let's Jon in on some details of his suspicions on her. Martin get's framed for Jurgen's death and NOW WE ARE AT

Season 3

So since Martin obviously doesn't have a place to hide it at the start of season 3 so Jon offers him to stay at his place. Jon knows that Martin didn't kill Jurgen and is willing to take the risk of giving Martin a  place to stay. Martin, of course, is hesitant but takes the offer because he's been crushing on Jon for the past forever and definitely will take his chances in staying in hot guy's flat. You know the shenanigans of s3 (Martin get's burned by Jude, kidnapped by Daisy, kipdnapped by Nikola) and FINALLY get's back into the archives to apologize to Jon for being gone from the flat for so long and apologizes again cause he's about to go off to america. Martin get's kidnapped again, comes back to london, and now it's time to stop an apocalypse! ( Before the unknowing happens, Jon and Martin share a heart to heart and confess that they both share feelings for another and get together the day before 118 happens then shit goes DOWN ). Martin of course, goes off to the unknowing and Jon stays behind at the archives to distract Elias. Elias tries and fails to use Jon's feelings for Martin against him, then switches to what happened with Georgie and the dead women walking incidents against him, pinning it on him because of his connection with the web. Martin stops the unknowing, Jon comes home to the empty apartment and gets the news that Martin is in a coma. (He immediately blames it on himself) and now it's time for

Season 4

Jon losing Martin right after realizing that they both love each other absolutely tears him apart. He moves flats and he begins to separate himself from the rest of the archives and works with peter. Martin wakes up from his coma without anyone by his side and is told the news to him about his mom right the day after. S4 basically goes the same with Martin seeing Jon again finally after the coma and goes to hug him and tell him how much he missed him but Jon just stares at him like he saw a ghost and leaves without saying a word to him. Alot of their interactions are sparse, usually with Martin trying to spark a convo with Jon resulting in usually no response or just a head shake as he scutters off.  Then Martin finally is able to actually talk to Jon and tells him that he misses him and that maybe they could catch up sometime but Jon just laughs and tells him that hes busy. Martin later on finds out about how to cut off the connection with the eye and goes to tell Jon that they could leave the archives but Jon tells him that he can't and tells Martin he doesn't want to see him anymore and kicks Martin out his office. You know what happens in 158 and 159, it's basically the same and Jon and Martin settle down at the safehouse.

I don't have much for season 5 but I really like the idea that Martin is still optimistic even after the change and that he reassures Jon that he's gonna find a way to fix it when it reality he has no clue and it terrified to think about what is going to happpen to them. They don't stay in the cabin that long soon after since Martin is very eager to go to the pannopticon and ya! Yknow how it goes.

Im so sorry I wrote a whole essay worth of shit but this au means alot to me and i get very excited when people ask me about it!!

[hookedonapirate]

Miss Fix-It

Summary: Miracle worker. Relationship Guru. Savior.

These are just a few of her monikers, but most people have taken to call her Miss Fix-It. Helping broken-hearted women get back together with their former boyfriends is her specialty. How does she do it, you ask? Simple—she becomes his date from hell so he’ll realize what a catch he had before he let her go.

Emma Swan is an expert at fixing relationships, it’s just too bad she’ll never have one of her own.

Her particular set of talents is tested, however, when a cheating ex-girlfriend requests her services. Emma’s reluctant at first. It’s not an easy task to make someone seem like a catch when they’ve cheated, but the potential client is an emotional wreck desperate to get her former boyfriend back before he heads back to England. Besides, Emma Swan never backs down from a challenge. They don’t call her Miss Fix-It for nothing. She’ll find a way to make him wish he was back in his ex-girlfriend’s arms, no matter what it takes. If only she can squash the feelings she develops for him and stop breaking her rules.

My Best Friend’s Girl meets How to Lose a Guy in 10 days.

A/N: A big shout out to @ultraluckycatnd for beta reading and to @onceuponaprincessworld for letting me share my ideas with her! 

Wow, I hadn't realized how long it's been since I updated this story until I saw the date I last posted, which was May 2020!!! I'm so sorry it's been so long. A lot has happened since then and I know I've probably lost some readers, but for those of you who have stuck around, thank you so much for your patience. I hope you enjoy the chapter ♥️

This is now part of the Captain Swan Movie Marathon collection, as it is primarily based on the movie Mr. Fix-It. Thanks @csmm for putting this together!

Also available on: AO3 l FF.N

Catch up: Ch 1 Ch 2 Ch 3 Ch 4

Chapter 5

“Hold on, love.” Killian steps back as he eyes Granny’s diner like he’s staring his worst nightmare in the face. He glances at Emma as confusion furrows her brows. “This is where you’re taking me?”

She nods. “Yeah. They have the best strawberry cheesecake pancakes. Trust me—a sugar coma is way better than an alcohol coma.”

His expression clouds with hesitation as he shakes his head. “I can’t go in. Ruby works here.”

“Not tonight.”

Killian lifts a brow. “How do you know?”

Damn. 

Emma curses herself as she keeps a straight face. Killian’s not the one who told her he went to her apartment to drop off her things; David did. “Because in the several texts Mary Margaret sent me, she mentioned Ruby was helping her with the invitations. Ruby needed a distraction.”

“Oh.” The creases in his forehead deepen. “Then why does Mary Margaret need David’s help, too?”

“I don’t know,” Emma snaps, louder than intended. Good God, this guy asks a lot of questions. “Probably because when Mary Margaret freaks out,” her eyes widen and she makes hand gestures for emphasis, “she freaks out.”

Killian scratches his ear as he looks inside the diner. “Still, I’m sure everyone who works here has heard the news and I’m not sure I want to—”

Emma grabs his hand and pulls him inside, not willing to argue about it, mostly because she doesn’t have a back-up plan. She didn’t want to make it seem like she pre-orchestrated this whole thing. He relents reluctantly and lets her lead him to a booth. “I’m not taking no for an answer. If you’ve ever had their strawberry cheesecake pancakes, you would understand.”

“I’m afraid I haven’t.”

“Well, you’re in for a treat. It’s good comfort food.”

They sit across from each other, and when Ashley tries to give them menus, Emma holds up her hand to reject them. “We already know what we want. I’ll have my usual hot cocoa and he’ll have an order of strawberry cheesecake pancakes with extra everything and chocolate milk.”

Killian doesn’t argue with her about it.

“Okay.” Ashley puts on a smile which fades when she looks at Killian, her eyes clouding with sympathy. “I heard what happened between you and Ruby. I’m so sorry.”

Killian pins Emma with an “I told you so” glare. She offers an apologetic smile in return. “Thanks, Ashley, but I’m fine.”

“Really? Because you don’t look—”

“It’s okay, Ash,” Emma interjects, waving off Ashley’s words with her hand. “He just needs to shove down his emotions with a heaping plate of sugar and shame, wash it down with chocolate milk, and then he’ll be perfect.”

Ashley glances between them suspiciously. “Wait, is this your way of getting back at Ruby?” she asks Killian as she points at Emma with the menus in her hand.

“No, I’m not getting back at Ruby,” he grumbles through gritted teeth. He looks at Emma. “She’s a friend.”

She’s not sure why, but her heart warms at the sentiment.

“Oh, I didn’t realize you two knew each other.”

“Why wouldn’t we?” Emma asks defensively. “It is a small town, and well, we both know Ruby.”

“True, I’ve just never seen you together.”

Emma refrains from sighing in exasperation. Why is everyone a fucking detective all of a sudden?

Maybe Killian was right—they should’ve gone somewhere else.

“We just met tonight,” Killian says. “She works at the Rabbit Hole, now.”

“Oh, I didn’t know that,” Ashley says in surprise.

“Can we get that hot cocoa and those pancakes now?” Emma asks impatiently, growing frustrated and a little panicked. This is exactly why she always meets her targets outside of town where people don't know her and won't ask a bunch of prying questions.

“Of course. Coming right up,” she assures before walking away.

Ashley returns a moment later with their beverages. Killian just stares blankly at his chocolate milk as Emma dips her finger in the whipped cream from her hot cocoa and brings it to her mouth, sucking off the sugary substance. Expecting Killian to watch her, she’s kind of disappointed when he doesn’t. Licking the whipped cream off her finger is a foolproof tactic that always garner’s the guy’s attention no matter what. But apparently not with Killian. Instead, he leans his elbows on the table and looks around like he’s afraid Ruby will suddenly pop into the diner at any moment.

This is going to be harder than she originally speculated.

“Look, if it really bothers you to be here, we can go somewhere else,” she sighs in retreat.

“No, it’s fine,” he says gloomily. “It’s just…” His words trail off and the earlier despair she’d witnessed on his face reappears. “This is where Ruby and I met,” he explains with a sad smile. “I came here after moving into my new apartment all day and she was my waitress.” His eyes shine with unshed tears as he recalls the night he met her like it were yesterday. “I’d had the worst day; nothing went as it was supposed to. But when I sat down at this exact booth, Ruby came over to me with the brightest smile on her face and she instantly cheered me up.” A tear slips from Killian’s eyes—a tear she could tell he was trying to fight back. “And um, we just hit it off. Her shift was ending soon, so after she clocked out, she sat across from me and we talked for hours.”

More tears slide down his cheeks. “I’ll never forget that night, no matter how much I want to forget it. No matter how much the image of seeing her with…” He pauses, his hands fisting on the table, his teeth gritting, “with my best friend.” An unexpected sob escapes him as he drops his face in his hands, and Emma scans the diner, wondering if anyone heard, but only a few customers glance over and then return their attention to either their food or the person sitting in front of them. 

When Killian cries into his palms, Emma’s heart breaks for him. He really liked Ruby—or loved; she doesn’t really know—but she could sense how torn up he was over being cheated on by her. His cries become louder and his body jerks and trembles as inhuman sounds wretch from his throat. Emma’s heart is gripped with emotion; she can feel the sadness he’s expressing from across the table. She hates seeing him like this, and it has nothing to do with the show he’s displaying for the diner patrons. 

Responding on instinct, she jumps from her seat, hurries to his side of the booth, and sits next to him, rubbing his back in soothing circles. She looks around, giving the customers who are staring a slight, apologetic smile. Normally she would never dream of sitting on the same side of the table with someone while the seat across from them is empty, but this is one of those rare exceptions.

Killian takes her off guard when he thrusts his head against her chest and winds his arms around her, sobbing into her shirt. Emma’s eyes widen in shock as she brings both hands to his back, one giving him a gentle pat. Other than that, she has no idea what to do. What do you tell someone you just met that will make them feel better when they’re sobbing uncontrollably? She can’t tell him everything will be okay, can she? 

She peers down at him, wondering how things escalated so quickly. She’d brought him to this diner specifically so the memories of Ruby would unleash the emotions he hasn’t yet expressed, hoping he would open up to her. She expected a current and maybe a little mist, but she didn’t expect the fucking dams to break. 

Emma’s blouse and chest become damp from his tears as she cards a hand through his hair, feeling him tremble in her arms. She had unfastened the first few buttons a while ago, so her chest is soaked too, and his head is cradled just above her breasts.

Not that she’s complaining.

Emma gently turns her head to look for Ashley, not wanting her to freak out over seeing him break down like he is, and when she sees their server approaching, she whispers to Killian, “Ashley’s coming over here.”

He sniffles and lifts his head, wiping the tears from his face and whispering a thanks.

Emma picks up a wrapped silverware set and removes the napkin, offering it to Killian.

“Bloody hell, love. I’m so sorry,” he mumbles in apology as he wipes his tears with the napkin.

Ashley arrives at their table, dropping off the plate of pancakes. “Strawberry cheesecake pancakes with extra everything. Anything else I can get—” She pauses when she catches Killian’s face. “Are you okay?”

He nods and wipes under his eyes with the napkin. “Aye. I’m fine. Just got something in my eye is all.”

“Uh-huh,” she says, obviously not believing him. And judging by the stink-eye Ashley’s giving her, Emma can tell she doesn’t believe she and Killian are only friends.

“He’ll be fine once he eats his pancakes,” Emma assures her.

“All right, well, let me know if there’s anything else you need,” she says directly to Killian.

“Thanks, lass,” he murmurs, staring blankly at his plate. After Ashley leaves, Emma grabs a fork, scoops up a bit of pancake and brings it to his lips. “Here, try a bite.” She thinks he might refuse it, but instead, he reluctantly opens his mouth, allowing her to feed him.

Wow, this is the weirdest date she’s ever been on.

If you can even call it a date.

Surprisingly, he chews the food in his mouth and licks his lips.

Oh my.

Emma has to look away and clench her thighs, trying to rid the thoughts of other things he could be doing with that tongue. Specifically, things he could be doing to her.

“You were right, love. These pancakes are actually making me feel better.”

His statement throws her for a loop, and she whips her head toward him, lifting a brow. “Really?”

He offers a small smile. “A little.” He takes the fork from her and stabs at another piece. “But I’ll probably stop feeling better once it’s gone, so maybe you could ask Ashley to keep the pancakes coming?”

Emma manages a small laugh. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. You’ll end up feeling worse than you already do.”

He frowns. “I don’t think that’s possible.”

Emma sighs into her hot cocoa and takes a sip.

Yep, she certainly has her work cut out for her.

Emma tries to change the subject by asking what his favorite bands are, but then he veers right back into the subject of Ruby when he recalls how he went to her place to return her things, which included her CDs. He mentions it because he also had his CDs at her place, but she refused to hand them over until he was willing to let her talk. But he didn’t want to talk. He just wanted to get his things and leave, but instead, he stayed and argued with her until they were both blue in the face.

Nevertheless, Emma gives him her undivided attention as he rambles on, so he feels comfortable enough to open up to her.

When he finishes the pancakes, he was right about feeling miserable again and tries to order more. Emma pays the bill before he can, and has to drag him out of the diner.

“Are you okay with driving home?” she asks when they return to the bar.

“Aye. Another benefit of having pancakes instead of rum is I can’t get drunk from pancakes.”

“Well, unless they were rum pancakes,” she points out.

His eyes light up with curiosity, and Emma gets the feeling she's created a monster. “Rum pancakes? Do they make those?”

She laughs. “Not sure, but I think the best thing to do now is sleep.”

He frowns. “I don’t know if I can. Every time I close my eyes, I picture her with him, and I can’t…” His voice cracks, and his eyes well with tears again.

Emma’s heart breaks. She knew he was torn up, but she really had no idea just how torn up he was. The old pancake trick didn’t work, all it did was make him want more pancakes, so she knows she’ll have to resort to drastic measures. Emma grabs his hand and hauls him down the sidewalk.

“Where are we going, love?” 

“You obviously need to release some major stress, and I know the perfect place where you can do that.”

Thankfully, he doesn’t argue—she doesn’t think he has enough energy to argue with her if he wanted to—and soon they’re standing in front of a building with a big sign above the door that reads, “Break Room Therapy” in bold blue letters and features an illustration of a pair of crossed sledgehammers.

Killian furrows his brows. “What is this place?”

Emma’s mouth falls open in shock. “I thought you lived in Storybrooke, and yet you’ve never been here?”

He shakes his head. “I see this place all the time but never knew what it really was. I always see women going in here, so I didn’t think it was a place for a lad like myself.”

Emma shakes her head. “This is a place we can go where no one will think we’re crazy if we break some shit, but it’s not just for women. We’re not the only ones who need to let off some steam sometimes.”

He cocks a brow. “Break some shit? What kind of shit?”

Emma smirks and opens the door for him, gesturing inside. “That’s for me to know and you to find out.”

He’s hesitant, but steps inside and she follows behind him. They approach the desk where her friend, Archie, is sitting, his face buried in a book. His office has the appearance of a typical break room, a collection of Star Wars Funko Pops on his desk, a water cooler and a life-sized statue of baby Yoda standing on a mini-fridge and holding a sign that reads, “Welcome to Break Room Therapy.”

“Appointments only,” Archie says as he lifts his eyes from his book to greet the incoming customers. His lips form a big smile when he sees Emma. “Oh, hi Emma. My apologies, I didn’t realize it was you,” he says, setting the book down and rising from his seat.

“Hey, Archie,” she greets with a smile.

“Back again so soon, I see?”

Emma nods. “Uh, yeah, but not for me. She grabs Killian’s arm who has his hands shoved in his pockets, still standing by the door with an awkward look on his face. “This is my friend, Killian. He needs to use one of your rooms.”

“Oh, right, of course.” He gestures toward the chairs in front of the desk. “Please have a seat.”

Killian still looks unsure, but complies anyway, slumping into a chair next to Emma as Archie reclaims his seat across from them.

“So what brings you in tonight?” he asks Killian.

“He got cheated on by his girlfriend,” Emma answers when she suspects Killian doesn’t want to.

His face clouds with sorrow as Archie’s saddens. “I’m so sorry to hear that. Well, this is the right place for you, then.”

Killian furrows his brows and looks around. “What exactly is this place?”

Archie exchanges a look with Emma before returning his attention to Killian. “This is a place where you can release some of that pent up anger you’re feeling right now.” Archie looks at Emma. “Will you be joining him?”

She nods. “Yes, please.”

He prints some papers and gives Killian and Emma both a copy, pointing out for Killian with a pen where to sign and date.

Killian scans over the forms, his forehead wrinkled in confusion as he reads a line out loud. “I hereby consent to medical treatment, which may be advisable in the event of an injury?” He looks up from the document, his face awash with confusion. “Why would I need medical treatment?”

Archie casually waves a hand. “Oh, don’t worry…as long as you follow the rules and wear the protective gear properly, you should be completely fine.”

The furrow in Killian’s brows deepens. “Why would I need protective gear?”

“To protect yourself so you don’t get broken shards in your eyes or skin, of course.”

Killian’s eyes flicker with panic. “Why would I have to worry about that?”

“Just sign it, Killian,” Emma huffs in irritation as she hands Archie her signed papers.

He puts up a hand of dismissal. “Now, now, Emma. Killian must consent to the terms voluntarily.”

“This is supposed to help me feel better?” Killian asks, still uncertain about this entire thing.

“Yes, just trust me. I come here all the time to release stress. It works like a charm. And it’s a lot of fun.”

Killian considers her words and scans over the documents once more before scribbling his signature. “Fine. I can’t possibly feel worse than I do already.” He hands Archie the signed papers.

“That’s the spirit,” Emma chants, clapping her hands.

“Excellent,” Archie says with a grin. “Let’s get you suited up.”

They rise, and Archie leads them to the equipment and protective gear. After some quick instructions, he asks them which weapons they prefer.

With each of them wearing a face shield, Killian holding a sledgehammer and Emma carrying a baseball bat, they head to one of the rooms.

“Have a smashing good time,” Archie quips and closes the door, standing outside the caged window to monitor and take pictures. The walls are made of OSB and the floor is marked up with black duct tape. There’s a round table in the center of the room with a flatscreen computer monitor situated upright.

“After you,” Emma says, gesturing toward the monitor.

Killian looks at her, still unsure. “I just smash it?”

She gives a nod. “You just smash it.”

Killian raises the hammer into the air with both hands, and with a shaky breath, he strikes the monitor with hesitant force, barely making a dent.

“Come on, Killian, you can do better than that. Just think about how angry Ruby made you when you saw her fucking your best friend. Just let yourself feel that rage and release it.” Before Emma’s done speaking, he smashes the computer again with a more powerful force than before.

“That’s it. Just let it out!” she encourages.

So he does. He turns the monitor over, so the screen is facing the ceiling, and strikes it with the sledgehammer, smashing the screen with a groan. He shatters the rest of the glass into a million pieces, much like Ruby did to his heart. But he doesn’t stop there; he strikes the computer over and over and over again until it’s nothing but a mangled and mutilated piece of scrap.

He has to pause to steady his breathing.

“Feel better?” she asks with a laugh.

“Actually, yes, that does feel quite good. What’s next?”

“Easy, tiger. It’s my turn.” Emma sets down the bat, grabs a plate from the crate of breakable items and tosses it across the room, the dish shattering into the wall with a satisfying smash. Killian follows suit and sets down the hammer to pick up a glass bottle, tossing it at the wall, watching as it disintegrates into a thousand tiny pieces.

A hint of a smile appears on his lips. “This is fun, love.”

“I told you.” She tosses another plate against the wall like a frisbee.

They each take turns, smashing items with a sledgehammer or bat, or throwing them against the wall, the room filled with sounds of heavy panting, grunts and glass breaking or plastic being obliterated. While Killian releases the whirlwind of emotions resulting from his breakup and takes out his rage for Ruby and Victor on electronic equipment, Emma takes hers out on multiple dishes for having to lie to Killian, and for feeling pressured by her best friend and Ruby to do this job in the first place. She’s spent a lot of time in this same room, but most of the time she acts out the rage she will always feel for the bastard she married and trusted before he broke her heart into a million pieces.

When they’ve gone through all the items in the crate, they both have to catch their breaths, adrenaline pumping through them, Emma’s heart pounding mercilessly in her chest. For acts that may seem so violent, smashing items with someone else feels very intimate and exhilarating for reasons she can’t really explain. They both expressed a side of each other they don’t normally show.

“Wow, that was…” he breathes, wiping the sweat from his brow.

“A good way to work off those pancakes while releasing some steam at the same time, huh?”

“Aye, it really was,” he chuckles.

They leave the room and remove their protective gear. 

“Thanks, Archie, that was a blast...or should I say, smash!” Emma quips.

“Aye, thank you,” Killian says to him appreciatively. “That actually helped a lot.”

Archie grins. “Good, I’m glad. Come back anytime.” He waves at them as they head out the door.

“Wow, that really was therapeutic,” Killian says as they reach her car, both of them facing each other. “Thank you for bringing me there. And for the pancakes.”

“Of course. What are friends for?” she adds with a wink.

“No, really, I mean it,” he says sincerely. “I felt like complete shit tonight and you managed to make me smile and laugh and feel like myself again.”

She waves off his words. “It was nothing. I’m just glad you feel better than you did.”

“I do, thanks to you.”

“Killian—” she attempts in a tone that is meant to tell him he really doesn’t have to thank her.

“Seriously, Emma, I could kiss you right now,” he chuckles. “I mean, I haven’t felt this good in a long time.”

Emma gulps as she stares at his lips, wondering what they would feel like if he did kiss her. She immediately squashes the thought and lifts her eyes to gaze into those crystal blue orbs instead. “Well, I’m happy to help.”

Killian steps into her space and raises a hand to her face. Her breath catches when his thumb caresses her cheek. She thinks he might actually kiss her. “Do you believe in fate?”

His question throws her for a loop and she opens her mouth, uttering a nonsensical sound as she tries to figure out how to respond to that. “Um, no, not really.”

“Well, I do. I believe we were destined to meet.”

Guilt flares inside Emma, her throat closing up. If only he knew this wasn’t destiny or fate or a fortunate stroke of serendipity. Well, meeting him at the elevator a couple of months ago was a sheer coincidence, but tonight was pre-orchestrated, and not by the universe; it was planned by her, and if he found out, she doubts he would want anything to do with her. It pains her to know he’ll hate her guts after this is all over. But she won’t blame him one bit. 

Before she gets the chance to respond, he leans in and kisses her cheek.

All the air leaves her lungs when his lips touch her skin, her brain becomes mush and she closes her eyes, trying not to dissolve into a puddle.

“Can I see you again?” he asks, his voice cracking, a hopeful glint in his eyes.

“But if us meeting each other was actually part of some predetermined plan, then wouldn't we run into each other again without having to make plans?”

He chuckles. “Perhaps.” He becomes quiet as his eyes grow serious. “But maybe I'm not willing to take that chance.”

Her throat becomes dry as sandpaper. She was not expecting an answer like that. He's the one who brought up the possibility of fate being on their side, yet he's not willing to take the chance he's wrong. Even though he knows where she works and where her friends live. 

Now she knows why Ruby fell for him. Well, she kind of already figured it out, but now she knows it was more than just his charming good looks, his boyish grin or his penis size.

“Um, yeah. Okay,” she answers against her better judgment. This is all going faster than she’d expected. She meant to part ways without making plans, and instead run into him “accidentally” again, but now she’s finding it impossible to deny his request. Besides, if they did run into each other “accidentally” then, for him, it would only solidify his belief that fate brought them together, and she'd feel horrible about that. Even more horrible than she already feels. “What exactly did you have in mind?”

He offers a sly grin, his tongue flirting with his lips. “That’s for me to know and you to find out.”

She shakes her head and smiles. “Well played.” She reaches out her hand. “Let me see your phone.”

He takes it out and unlocks it before handing the device to her without hesitation.

She plugs in her phone number and sends herself a text so she’ll recognize the number when he calls. She hands it back to him. “There, now you have my phone number, and I have yours.”

“Thanks, love.” He tucks his phone into the pocket of his jeans.

“Are you good to drive?”

He laughs. “Are you kidding? Smashing that computer sobered me up real quick. But I didn’t have a lot to drink to begin with, thanks to you,” he adds with a smirk.

She nods and feels her cheeks warm at the way he looks at her. “That’s true.”

He goes around her to open the driver’s door. God, this guy really knows how to make a woman feel special, even one he's not dating.

“This isn’t even a date and you’re still a gentleman,” she teases with a playful smirk.

“I’m always a gentleman,” he says with a cheeky grin. A grin so cheeky, her heart staggers. “Goodnight, Emma. Thanks again for tonight.”

“Night,” she murmurs, her heart clenching at the thought of leaving him. When he shuts the door, their eyes are still locked through the window, and the door that separates them doesn’t seem to help her at all, because her heart is pounding, and her breaths are shallow as his eyes pierce right through her.

He waves, and she waves back at him before starting her car. He finally turns and walks to his truck, his hands in his pockets as she watches him. Her heart squeezes in her chest when he increases the distance between them. She has to leave so he doesn’t think she’s just sitting there staring at him, which she definitely is.

She pulls away from the curb and drives away, hating herself for leaving him. But she has no idea why it hurts so much. She just met him a few hours ago. Well technically she met him a couple of months ago, but that’s neither here nor there. The point is, this guy is already clawing his way inside her heart, trying to make a home there and making her second guess her decision to help Ruby out. Why is it the one time she finds a guy she actually likes, he has to be one of the guys she’s trying to get back together with his girlfriend?

If destiny actually does exist, then it must be mocking her. 

Or perhaps this job is destiny’s way of helping her protect her own heart. Because if she can’t have anything real with him, then she can’t actually get hurt.

Right?

@onceuponaprincessworld @teamhook @artistic-writer @ilovemesomekillianjones @hollyethecurious @gingerchangeling@ultraluckycatnd @kmomof4 @searchingwardrobes @snowbellewells @let-it-raines @wellhellotragic @itsfabianadocarmo @lfh1226-linda @sophiaaz @becausetheyrehappythisway @thislassishooked @hookedmom @resident-of-storybrooke @kateroselin @chamomileandmint @kday426 @sals86 @lawgeeks @yasbio2015 @xsajx @delightfully-difficult-pirate @snowbellewells @wanderingjpg @squidvisious @tenaciouskittynight @biefaless @animatedshorts @lassluna @ejunkiet @melsbels @meat-pie-with-sauce @roseyflush @ivalane @tiganasummertree @nowforruin @qualitycoffeethings @nikkiemms @oncechicagolove @theonewiththeory @lostinwonderland314 @darkcolinodonorgasm @arshini01 @companion-mala @carpedzem @youareafeverdream @maguilar1028 @mayquita @courtorderedcake @shady-swan-jones @timeless-love-story @laschatzi @officerrogers @spartanguard @andiirivera @ouatpost @jarienn972 @winterbythesea @winterbaby89 @distant-rose @xhookswenchx @tiganasummertree

[captain-josslett]

Broken Melody - Part Four

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Eleven,

Summary: Grammy Award winning Emma Danvers is the first to say she has a pretty good life. But what happens when it implodes around her and it looks like things will never be the same again?

Words: 3.3k+

Warnings: None... yet... There is one more fic before the poop hits the fan

Pairings: Emma Danvers x Lena Luthor (Eventual)

This Part: It’s Christmas day!

As always B!D is named.

Thank you for reading and let me know if you wanna be tagged or any general feedback will be greatly appreciated.

Taglist: @thewitchandtheassassin , @natasha-danvers , @life-is-hella-unfair , @finleyfray​, @supergirl-writingz​

Emma Danvers is sleeping peacefully on Christmas morning. She’s in such a deep sleep that she doesn’t hear her bedroom door open and the patter of three pairs of feet.

Emma wakes with a start when both her sisters and Lena jump onto her and yell “MERRY CHRISTMAS!!”

“What the fuc… fudge?!” Emma screams and laughs as Kara keeps bouncing on her bed. Alex curls around her side like a koala bear and holds her close. Lena sits on the end of the bed and smiles brightly at Emma.

“Morning.” Alex murmurs and kisses Emma’s head.

“Morning.” Emma replies and snuggles into Alex’s arms, ready to go back to sleep.

“No! No sleep!” Kara yells straddling Emma’s stomach and starting to tickle the other blonde. Lena quickly moves out of the way, not wanting to get kicked by Emma’s flailing limbs.

“Kara! I need to pee!” Emma laughs and frantically tries to move away from her sister.

“Fine!” Kara huffs and floats off Emma, who scurries out of the bed but pauses when she sees Lena.

“Hi.” Emma smiles shyly at the raven haired beauty.

“I thought you needed the toilet?” Alex interrupts with raised eyebrows and Emma quickly races into the bathroom. Mainly to hide her blush.

“What’s going on in here?” Eliza appears in the bedroom doorway, all showered and dressed. A few days after the concert Emma had insisted Eliza leave the hotel and come stay in her spare room. And honestly, Emma enjoyed having her Mom around.

“Just saying Merry Christmas.” Kara smiles brightly.

“Scaring me to death more like.” Emma says yawning as she exits her en-suite.

“Aw my poor baby.” Eliza holds out her arm and Emma immediately goes into the hug. Alex giggles before following Emma and joining the hug. Kara barrels into them, wrapping her arms around her family.  Eliza looks over at the CEO, who was awkwardly staring down her feet. “Come on Lena!”

Lena’s head snaps up at hearing her name and when Eliza motions for her to join the hug, Lena bites her lips.

“We won’t move from here until you do.” Eliza warns.

“And believe me, she means it.” Alex laughs into her Mom’s shoulder.

Emma lifts her head and holds out an arm. Lena slowly moves forward and when she’s within reach Emma wraps her arm around her, pulling her into the group hug.

It had taken the Danvers a lot of convincing to get Lena to join them on Christmas day after she accidentally let it slip she’d be spending it alone. But Emma and Kara wouldn’t take no for an answer and Lena was touched that the Danvers cared so much.

“Merry Christmas.” Eliza kisses her daughter’s and Lena’s head.

“Merry Christmas Mom.” Emma yawns again and buries her head in Alex’s neck.

“Emma…” Eliza says stepping away and looking at her youngest. Who tenses slightly at her Mom’s stern tone. Lena wants to laugh when she feels Emma hold onto her more.

“Oh someones in trouble.” Alex whispers.

“Emma. Look at me.” Eliza orders and Emma complies. “What time did you go to bed last night after I said goodnight to you?”

“Erm…”

“Better tell the truth peanut.” Alex says quietly.

“4?” Emma says sheepishly.

“Emma!” Both Eliza and Kara yell. Kara steps out of the hug looking outraged.

“I’m sorry! I was getting ready for bed but then an idea for a song came and I couldn’t get it out of my head!” Emma buries her head back into Alex’s neck, who chuckles softly and rubs her hand over Emma’s back.

“Well don’t complain to me that you feel tired later today.” Eliza scoffs before leaving the room, Kara following behind her.

“I didn’t mean to.” Emma mumbles softly.

“I know peanut.” Alex pulls Emma away from her and holds the blonde’s shoulders. “How bout you have a nice shower to wake yourself up? Mom will hopefully have cooled down by then. You know how hot tempered us Danvers girls can be!”

“Don’t I know it!” Emma laughs before turning to her crush. “Merry Christmas Lee.”

“Merry Christmas Em.” Lena says shyly.

“Emma. Shower. Now.” Agent Danvers orders, causing Emma to roll her eyes at Lena who lets out a snort. Emma grins at her before heading back into her en-suite.

Alex sighs, hoping the plan she and Kelly have come up with to get Emma and Lena together will work. She follows Lena into Emma’s big, open planned apartment. Making sure to shut Emma’s bedroom door behind her.

Fairy lights and decorations were expertly placed around the apartment and it warmed Alex’s heart to see the effort Emma went into making her home a wonderful setting for them to spend Christmas. The two women approach Eliza and Kara who are preparing to cook the Christmas meal.

“Honestly your sister!” Eliza huffs and Alex can’t help but smile slightly.

“She’s under a lot of pressure at the moment.” Alex says while sitting on a stool by the island. Quickly grabbing a piece of raw carrot that Kara had chopped and giving her sister a look when Kara holds the knife up threateningly.

“Do you need me to do anything?” Lena asks looking over the mass of food.

“No thank you Lena. You sit with Alex and relax.” Eliza says kindly.

Lena does and fiddles with her hands. Not used to not being needed or doing something.

“What did you mean Alex?” Kara frowns as she turns her attention back to the redhead. “That Emma is under a lot of pressure?”

“Don’t tell her I told you this.” Alex looks over at Emma’s closed door. “Her record label is really pushing her to release a solo album soon after the tour ends.”

“Why?” Eliza’s eyes are wide. Knowing how exhausted Emma gets after her tours as she pours her all into them.

“The success from the concert.” Alex grabs another piece of carrot and Kara glares at her.

The concert had ended a week ago and was already considered one of the best out there.

“Videos have already been uploaded to Youtube and people are going mad for Emma’s new sound. That’s why there was suddenly a live album of the show.” Alex explains, narrowly missing Kara’s knife when she takes another piece of carrot.

“I’m glad they did, I can’t stop listening to it.” And Lena wasn’t lying. Whenever the CEO had a free moment she’d be watching Youtube clips of the concert over and over again. Transfixed by Emma’s beauty and talent.

“Me too! Hasn’t that gone to number 21 or something?” Kara asks, finally giving up on trying to stop Alex from taking anymore carrots.

“I’ll have a look.” Alex says as she crunches the carrot. She opens her phone and looks at what's trending in the music charts. Her eyes go wide and she freezes.

“Alex?” Eliza tilts her head at her stilled daughter.

“It’s number 1.” Alex whispers out causing the other women around the island to freeze.

“Well! That ice cold shower made me feel so much better!” Emma walks out of her bedroom in a red skater dress and her hair plaited to the side. She goes over to the island and leans against it and then looks at the women around it. Instantly she straightens up at how wide eyed Lena, her Mom and sister are. “What’s wrong?”

Kara immediately gets her phone and starts a live video to get Emma’s reaction. Causing the other blonde to give her a puzzled look. Alex then holds out her phone to Emma who looks down at it. When she reads what's on the scream her hazel green eyes go wide and her mouth drops open.

“Oh… My… WHAT?!” Emma yells and Alex leaps to her feet pulling Emma into a bone crushing hug. They jump up and down yelling in excitement. Kara hands Eliza her phone to keep recording and joins in. Lena smiles happily at the sisters and wipes her tears away.

Emma looks at the phone in her Mom’s hand and knows she wants to say something. “Okay… So… Wow…” She lifts a hand to her forehead, trying to think of what to say. “Thank you, this truly means the world to me and is one of the best Christmas presents I’ve ever had. Thank you and I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas.” Emma blows a kiss to the camera and Eliza stops the video.

Emma then blows out her breath and looks at Alex’s phone again. The two sister’s look over her shoulder with identical grins on their faces. Emma’s expression is of disbelief and joy. Lena picks her phone up and takes a photo, wanting to remember this achievement in Emma’s life and knowing there will be many, many more.

-- -- --

A few hours later, after the Christmas banquet, the women had made their way over to Emma’s sofas.

“I don’t think I can eat another bite.” Emma sighs happily while laying partly on the sofa. Her legs hanging over the side and her head is resting on Lena’s lap.

“Speak for yourself!” Kara laughs and wonders if she can go back for thirds.

“No Kara, save some for later.” Eliza says as if able to read her mind, while she combs her fingers through Alex’s hair.

“Oooookay.” Kara grumbles. “So, when are we opening presents?”

“Soon.” Emma says softly, ready to go into a food coma and sleep for a few hours.

“Ah come on!” Kara whines.

“Fine, fine, fine.” Emma swings her legs round and sits up. Missing the sad look Lena gives her as she moves away.

“Yay!” Kara zooms over to the Christmas tree ready to hand out the gifts. A lot of “awwww”s and “thank you”s sound around the apartment as the presents are opened. Finally only a few are left.

“Kara, can you grab the four square presents behind the tree?” Emma asks and points to them.

“These?” Kara holds them up and reads the label.

“Yea.” Emma smiles shyly as Kara passes them out to Eliza, Alex, Lena and takes the one addressed to her. Emma does like buying gifts and spending money on those she loves. But Emma finds more joy in making something, though it always terrifies her that what she paints may not be liked.

“Shall we open them together?” Alex asks, fingers already pulling a corner of the tape away.

“I guess.” Emma shrugs, her eyes darting to everyone around her.

“No, let’s open it one at a time.” Kara interrupts. “I mean, unless they are the same?”

Emma shrugs again and settles into the sofa.

“I’ll go first.” Alex says while tearing the paper off. “Oh wow.” Alex breathes out and runs her hand over the painting. “Em, this is… wow.”

“What is it?” Kara asks, wanting to see. Alex turns the painting around and Kara recognises it as a view on one of their favourite hiking trails in Midvale. “Wow.”

“Mom, you go next.” Emma says while grabbing a cushion and placing it on her lap. Something she does when she's nervous. She watches her Mom open hers and is relieved when Eliza smiles.

“Emma, this is beautiful.” The painting was of the backs of Alex, Kara, Eliza and Emma with their arms around each other looking out to the lake near their home.

Kara looks down at her wrapped painting. “Can I go next?”

“Sure.” Emma smiles and bites her lip as she watches Kara rip into the paper.

“Oh Em!” Tears pool into Kara’s eyes and Emma’s heart drops.

“What is it?” Lena asks curiously, wanting to see what made her best friend tear up.

“Krypton.” Kara's voice cracks as she looks over the details. Tears fall down her face as she takes it all in. “How… How did you get it so perfectly?”

“I may have asked Clark to copy some slides from the Fortress of Solitude.” Emma says sheepishly, hoping she hasn’t crossed a line. “I mean I did have an idea of what to do, with how much you talked about Krypton, but I wanted to get it perfect for you."

“It is perfect.” Kara gulps and Superspeeds over to the baby sister. Pulling her into a tight hug. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Emma says softly as she rubs Kara’s back. She moves so Kara can sit next to her, making Emma move closer to Lena.

“Now Lena’s turn!” Kara says happily as she wipes her eyes. Careful not to smudge her makeup.

Alex watches Emma carefully as her sister stiffens slightly and the worry rolls off the blonde.

Lena looks down at the gift and carefully unwraps it. She gasps when the painting is revealed.

“Do you like it?” Emma asks hesitantly.

The painting was of their time at the beach in the summer. Where they were having lunch and Lena had thrown her head back laughing at a joke someone had said. Emma had perfectly captured the joy on Lena’s face and the colours of the white sand and the turquoise sea in the background.

“I love it.” Lena says softly. Her eyes darting over the painting, taking it all in.

Emma lets out a sigh of relief and settles back into the sofa. But Lena gently places the painting on the coffee table in front of her and pulls Emma into a hug. The other Danvers women look down at the painting. They ooo and ahh at it.

“Thank you. It’s the best present I’ve ever had.” Lena whispers into Emma’s ear and feels Emma’s smile widen.

“I’m glad you like it.” Emma pulls away slightly to look into Lena’s green eyes. “It’s how I see you.”

Alex watches the two and holds her breath. ‘Kiss!’  Her mind yells and slowly Lena and Emma lean towards each other.

BUZZZZ

Alex could scream at the intercom as it breaks the spell between the two women. They shyly smile at each other and Emma scoots away. Kara flies over to answer and lets whoever is on the other end up to the apartment.

Soon all the Superfriends are gathered in Emma’s apartment and are mingling around in groups.

“So, wait…” Sam holds her hand up as Alex tries to explain what happened earlier. “They almost kissed, but then your brother stops them by pressing the intercom button.”

“James always had perfect timing.” Kelly says sarcastically as she sips her drink.

“They were so close, literally I was ready to release a party popper!” Alex huffs and looks over at Emma, who is gazing longingly at Lena across the room. “Oh Rao… Look at Emma.” Alex whispers to the two other women. They follow Alex’s eye line and sigh.

“Seriously! We cannot let them leave here without kissing! That’s it! I’m putting my foot down!” Sam whispers to Kelly and Alex. Not realising Kara had overhead and was choking on her drink. Causing Lena to pat her back in concern.

“Better?” Lena asks as Kara regains her breath.

“Y-yea. Woo that went the wrong way. Won’t be doing that again!” Kara says a bit too happily and backs away from her best friend before zooming off to Alex. Noticing how Emma immediately makes her way over to Lena. The two falling into a quiet conversation.

“You okay Kara?” Alex asks with a raised eyebrow.

“How long?”

“How long what?” Alex asks back confused.

“How long has my best friend and our baby sister… You know.” Kara waves her hands around.

“You really didn’t know?” Kelly asks, surprised.

“No!” Kara yells loudly causing a few Superfriends to look over at the group.

“I told you she is completely oblivious.” Alex smirks into her drink.

“Not all of the time!”

“Most of the time.” Alex counters. “So are you going to help us get Emma and Lena together?”

Kara thinks for a second. “What do you have planned?”

After filling Kara in, the plan is set in motion and Alex just waits for the right opportunity. Kara is on standby with the mistletoe and when the time is right she’s going to Superspeed it above the two women.

Currently Emma is talking to Nia and Lena is looking over some designs Brainy has come up with. The two not being able to stay away from work long enough.

“What you looking at Lena?” Sam looks over her friend's shoulder.

“Oh, schematics of a serum Brainy and I have been trailing. It’s designed to help heal a person’s wounds quicker.”

“Wow.” Sam blinks as her mind tries to compute with the possibility.

“Yea.” Lena smiles at the brunette. “It’s still the early stages… But, I think we have a shot at this.”

“Brainy, could you tell me a bit more about it?” Sam tilts her head, looking intrigued.

“Of course.” Brainy takes the tablet from Lena’s hands and starts talking Sam through it in more detail. Sam doesn’t understand most of it but nods her head anyway.

Lena moves away from the two and looks around the room. This has truly been one of the best Christmases she’s had in a very long time. To be a part of the Danvers experience, to be with people who cared and loved her, warms Lena’s heart.

She subconsciously looks for Emma and finds her standing alone by her wooden upright piano. Her finger lightly pressing the keys as she plays out a melody in her head. Kelly spots Lena looking and leads Nia away, both talking animatedly. 

Lena bites her lip and makes her way over to the blonde.

“Hi.” Lena says shyly and Emma lifts her head.

“Hi.” Emma says shyly back and smiles warmly.

“Have you enjoyed today?” Lena asks, leaning against the piano.

“Yea I have. How about you? It hasn’t been too overwhelming being with us all day?”

Lena laughs loudly. “No, it’s been wonderful.”

“I’m glad.” Emma tilts her head and bites her lip. “I er… Actually have something else for you.” Emma reaches into her dress pocket and pulls out a little box.

“Oh Em! You already got me so much!” Lena says wide eyed as Emma hands her the box.

“Yea but I saw this in Ireland and thought of you.” Emma watches as Lena carefully opens the box.

“Em.” Lena gasps out and tears fill her eyes. “It’s beautiful.” Inside the box was a delicate Celtic knot with a genuine emerald in the middle. Lena’s Mam always wore a necklace like it when she was alive. “You remembered?”

“Of course. You always speak so fondly of your Mam and Ireland, so I wanted to find something for you while I was there.”

“Thank you.” Lena says feeling truly touched that Emma would take the time to look for a gift on her busy tour. “Can you help me put it on?”

Emma nods and takes the necklace out of the box. Lena turns around and Emma fastens the clasp.

Movement above them makes Lena look up. “Oh.”

“What?” Emma asks as Lena turns to face her.

“Mistletoe.”

Emma looks up and sure enough there's mistletoe above them. She frowns slightly. ‘I didn’t place that there…’ Emma thinks before her gaze goes back to Lena, who is biting her lip.

For a moment Emma can’t breath. She’d be lying if she says she didn’t want to kiss Lena right now.

“Would be bad luck not too.” Lena says quietly, tilting towards the blonde.

“Is that so?” Emma leans towards the raven haired beauty.

They linger and Emma doesn’t miss the way Lena’s eyes look down at her lips and back up to her eyes.

Finally they both close the gap between them and their lips connect.

Fireworks explode and they deepen the kiss.

Suddenly a noise makes them pull back and look towards James who is staring at them in disbelief.

Emma doesn’t miss the look of outrage on Alex’s face towards James. How Kelly and Sam both hold her back. She chuckles slightly and focuses on Lena. They both smile at each other.

‘Best Christmas ever.’ Emma thinks happily.

(Part Five)

[astheskycries]

Burn- 4

Katherine Hayes is the last person you’d expect to see working for the famous Fantastic 4: She’s quiet, blends into the background, and completely powerless, unlike her new roommates-slash-bosses. Unfortunately for her, she’s captured the attention of Johnny Storm, the hotshot who loves a challenge. Can he win her over or will he be unable to save her from his enemies?

1 2 3 

Masterlist Buy me a Coffee

“There,” The man says, seeing her on the screen as she stops next to Johnny Storm in the living room, her arms crossed as he watches a bike show. “What are you doing here? You don’t belong with them.”

He flicks his wrist, and another screen turns to a hospital room where a woman lies in a coma.

“I see,” He muses. His fist tightens, and the woman’s body spasms, and then her eyes snap open. “Now you don’t have a reason to stay,” He says quietly.

…

“Care to join me?” Johnny asks, grinning at me mischievously. His arm is over the back of the couch and his other is braced on the arm rest, the symbol of lazy relaxation that makes you want to join without a second thought. It’s tempting, but I’ve been avoiding him since the test last week, instead staying out of the house or in my room.

I don’t move. “Bike shows?”

“Is there anything else?”

I eye the screen. I do like bike shows, but whatever I do with him encourages… whatever he’s doing.

“Hey,” He says, reaching out to touch my arm, and I feel the warmth instantly. No wonder women love him; he’s a personal furnace. “You keep acting scared of me. I thought you were past that?”

I raise a single eyebrow. “Wouldn’t you be nervous if you had no powers and the stubborn person could burst into flames at any time?”

He pauses before tilting his head to the side. “Point taken, but I would never hurt you.” He gently wraps his hand around my wrist and tugs me towards him, shifting before suddenly yanking, making me fall face-first into the couch. “See? Didn’t even hurt.”

“That’s debatable,” I mutter turning around and moving so we aren’t touching. I cross my arms again and keep myself focused on the TV.

He sighs again before wrapping an arm around my shoulders, pulling me against his side and keeping me there when I try to move away. At first I stay stiff, but he’s very warm, and I’m watching a bike show, and I finally cave, relaxing and pretending not to see his smile through my lashes.

Then my phone rings.

I jump up and hit talk. “Hello?”

“Katherine? We have news about your mother.”

I tense. “What happened?”

“She’s awake.”

I think I say something, and then I hang up and dart over to the closet, grabbing my shoes and a coat. “I have to go.”

“Go where?” Johnny asks, watching me with a frown.

I hesitate. “Nowhere. Make sure to save some food for me, ok?”

“Why don’t you just buy something while you’re out?”

“I don’t have any money,” I say automatically. Then I want to smack myself.

“What do you mean you don’t have any money?” Johnny asks, frowning as he rises. “Sue pays you a lot, especially for a lab assistant.”

“I have to go,” I say, spotting Sue walking towards the kitchen. “Sue, I have to go!”

She nods once. “Go ahead. Try to be back by tomorrow.”

I nod once, grab my key, and practically run towards the door, refusing to look at Johnny.

…

“It would have been better if she had died.” The doctor says outside the door while the nurse checks over my mother. “It looks like there was an electricity shortage that jump-started her heart and startled her into waking up.”

“Ok… what did it to her?”

“She’s even sicker than before. You’ll be lucky if she survives the month.”

I force myself to nod. “Mom? I’ll be right back.” I call, leaning over to see her. I still can’t believe my mom’s awake. She doesn’t look much different, still blonde, still green-eyed, still happy. The only difference is the fatigue and knowledge that she’s going to die.

“Ok,” She says, smiling at me like she always has, and I rush into the bathroom and splash cold water on my face. I look at myself and scold myself. Mom won’t feel better if she knows you’re upset.

When I come back, I notice her smiling and talking to someone in the corner of the room where I can’t see. I frown and keep going, and almost trip. “Johnny? What are you doing here?”

He looks up at me calmly, still smiling from the conversation. “Hey Katherine. Why didn’t you tell me your mom was in the hospital?”

I don’t answer. “What are you doing here?”

“I was worried about what you said, so I followed you,” He tilts his head. “Apparently I should have. You should have told me.”

Mom smiles at me, tapping the chair next to her, and I reluctantly sit down. “I told him I might not survive the month.” I tense, but she continues calmly. “I asked him to make sure you take care of yourself.”

“Mom,” I protest.

“I told her I’d watch you,” He says, smiling softly at me.

“So how long have you two been friends?” Mom asks, smiling at me and looking like her old self.

“About a week,” Johnny says, grinning mischievously. “She’s working for my sister.”

“Really? Is she behaving?”

“Mom,” I snap, making her laugh.

“Sort of,” He says, holding my gaze. “I think she’s still scared of me.”

My cheeks burn. “I’m not scared of you, Storm.”

“Uh huh,” He says, leaning back lazily, but I can see in his eyes that he’s enjoying this. “We should probably head out soon. We can grab some dinner if you want.”

I look at Mom, about to say that I need to stay with her, but she squeezes my hand. “Go,” She says quietly, smiling. “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you so relaxed.”

My cheeks burn, and I really hope Johnny didn’t hear that, but based on that smirk… nope, not thinking about it. “Ok. I’ll see you as soon as I can, ok?”

She smiles. “I’m proud of you, sweetheart, especially after your brother.”

I bite my lip, trying not to think about that. No one will trust me then. “I love you, Mom.”

Johnny wraps an arm around my shoulder, making me elbow him, and he laughs. “So, food?” He asks, leading me away.

“Why did you really come?” I ask, crossing my arms so I won’t keep smacking my arm into him.

“I told you. I was worried about you.” I think I feel something against my temple, but neither of us say anything.

Tags: @janeyboo​ @mylittlefandomfanfictions​ @palaiasaurus64​ @averyrogers83​ @guera31​ @soulmates8​ @coffeebooksandfandom​ @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​ @averyrogers83​ @giftofdreams​ @pegasusdragontiger​ @mizzzpink​ @onetwo3000​ @see-you-again-my-sun-and-stars​ @sleepylunarwolf​ @wheresmyplums​ @smoothdogsgirl​ @marvelouslyme96​ @esoltis280​ @k-evans-writes​

[rosethornewrites]

Fic: the thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break, ch. 14

Relationships: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī & Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī & Wēn Qíng, Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn

Characters: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī, Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Wēn Qíng, Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín, Granny Wēn, Lán Yuàn | Lán Sīzhuī, Wēn Remnants, Wen Meilin (OC), Fourth Uncle, Lán Huàn | Lán Xīchén

Additional Tags: Pre-Slash, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Secrets, Crying, Masks, Soulmates, Truth, Self-Esteem Issues, Regret, It was supposed to be a one-shot, Fix-It, Eventual Relationships, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, wwx needs a hug, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Filial Piety, Handfasting, Phobias, Sleeping Together, Fear, Panic Attacks, Love Confessions, Getting Together, First Kiss, Kissing, Boys Kissing, Family, and they were married, Bathing/Washing, Hair Braiding, Hair Brushing, Feels, Sex Education, Implied Sexual Content, First Time, Aftercare, Morning After, Afterglow, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Torture, Scars, Eventual Happy Ending, Hand Jobs, Chronic Pain, Biting, Conversations

Summary: With Wei Wuxian on the mend, Wen Qing sends him into town with A-Yuan, Lan Wangji, and Wen Ning to keep him out of trouble. They run into someone unexpectedly.

Notes: See end.

AO3 link | FFN link (no smut)

Chapters:  1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13

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Wei Ying seems happy to be in town for the first time since his near-possession, cleared after nearly a week by Wen Qing. Lan Wangji is of the opinion that the surplus of radishes and need to sell them was more the reason for her clearance, along with the fact a bored Wei Ying was dangerous. 

The musical acupuncture helped him heal rapidly for someone without a golden core, according to Wen Qing. And Wei Ying had started to theorize about ways this could potentially be adapted to help Wen Ning—apparently one of the concerns was whether spiritual energy used in such a way would hurt him, or if using resentful energy could damage Wen Ning’s control. He didn’t feel ready to experiment just yet. 

There was only so much Lan Wangji could do to keep Wei Ying distracted once he was recovering, though the tidy rewritten notes thrilled his husband. After the third small explosion while he worked on the Compass of Evil, Wen Qing decided he’d do less damage selling radishes with Wen Ning in town, and insisted they take A-Yuan with them so Granny could rest.

Damage is a perhaps relative idea, when a fake Yiling Laozu disciple sets up shop next to them to hawk his counterfeit wares. 

Lan Wangji is surprised when Wei Ying finds the whole thing amusing, and says nothing when he steals the charlatan’s Compass of Evil, replacing it with a radish. Truthfully, the theft satisfies him; it grates on him to hear the lies gossips spew, to see people slander his zhiji for their own gain. 

The day is otherwise long, with Wen Ning too shy to effectively call attention to their radishes. Adorably, A-Yuan is a bit of a help there, enthusiastically calling the attention of young women who find him adorable (but at least purchased radishes), but he grows bored easily and needs redirection. 

It doesn’t help that Wei Ying keeps rubbing his hand over his collar with a dreamy expression, which more than once leads  Lan Wangji to recite the Lan precepts mentally lest he act inappropriately in public—Wei Ying is wearing his ribbon at his crown, so that restraint is absent. 

Under his collar is the evidence of his lack of restraint—a bruise in the shape of Lan Wangji’s teeth. 

He is careful, on the whole, given Wei Ying bruises easily in his unhealthy state, bruises that take too long to fade for Wangji’s comfort. But with Wei Ying straddling his lap and moaning obscenities in his ear, moving his hips just so, as he was tasting the sweat on his collar, his control had broken. 

At the bite, Wei Ying had come with an exultant “yes!” Their stomachs slick with it between them, his nails scraping at Lan Wangji’s back, clenching so hard around him his vision whited out with the force of his own orgasm. He can’t think about the bruise without remembering. 

Wei Ying likes the bruise, to Lan Wangji’s mortification. Likes being marked by him, little reminders of their every day.

“I know you’d never really hurt me, Lan Zhan,” he’d said, his voice filled with a trust Lan Wangji didn’t feel he deserved. “And I liked it, in case you couldn’t tell.”

Watching Wei Ying rub it here in town is a special kind of hell, him at arm’s length and too far from their bed. 

It becomes worse when Wei Ying glances his way and catches him looking, immediately reddening as though he knows exactly what he is thinking, which makes restraint all the more difficult. He looks beautiful, blushing. But he has always looked beautiful, and Lan Wangji had previously managed restraint—that was, however, before he had acknowledged their relationship, before they had consummated. Somehow the longing, the dreams and fantasies, had been much more manageable before he knew how Wei Ying’s sweat-slick skin tasted, how he felt coming apart. 

The sale of the last of the radishes is a relief, but they still need to purchase items on Wen Qing’s list before returning to Burial Mounds. He lets Wei Ying focus on A-Yuan, who insists on being carried, and walks alongside him without touching him. A-Yuan is practically hanging backward from Wei Ying’s arms, giggling at silly faces he’s making. Wen Ning takes up the rear with the cart, where he’ll have Wei Ying sit if his strength fails him. 

He is so focused on Wei Ying beside him that he doesn’t notice Jiang Wanyin in front of them until he halts, the smile on his face freezing, his stream of nonsense conversation with A-Yuan trailing into silence. 

Jiang Wanyin does not look happy.

But, then, he rarely does. 

Lan Wangji has to steel himself, doing his best not to look at the lower dantian where Wei Ying’s core now rests. Instead he bows politely.

“Sect Leader Jiang.”

Beside him, Wei Ying bows as best he can with A-Yuan in his arms, and he can sense movement behind him that tells him Wen Ning has followed suit. 

Jiang Wanyin’s lip curls, but he just silently tosses his head in a beckoning gesture. 

He can hear the way Wei Ying’s breath quickens, the bit of perspiration on his upper lip. Can sense his nervousness over what is to come, what he has decided to reveal. Lan Wangji takes a breath to calm himself. His husband needs him steady now.

The moment Jiang Wanyin turns to lead the way to wherever he intends them to speak, Lan Wangji puts a steadying hand on Wei Ying’s elbow as they follow and receives a wan smile in response. 

Lan Wangji is relieved he is wearing the clothing the aunties sewed for him today, wearing a simpler guan Wei Ying had carved for him personally after he had expressed reluctance to continue wearing the one he had worn to befit and show his station. Wei Ying had carved two rabbits on the guan, one wearing a forehead ribbon and the other stained a darker color with leftover dye from the dock root. The craftwork had distracted him nicely for a while. 

The clothing is of a heavier weave than he is used to, but he doesn’t mind it. If the plainer clothing has distracted Jiang Wanyin from noticing Lan Wangji is not wearing his forehead ribbon, that it is woven around Wei Ying’s crown and plaited with his red ribbon down his back, it is a relief. Jiang Wanyin is not known for an even temper, and his inattention has staved off what might be an argument until they are out of public. 

Wei Ying will find the coming conversations stressful enough in private. He doesn’t need it to start publicly and draw attention from the locals. 

Despite all the rumors about Wei Ying floating around Yiling, none of the regular citizens seem to know what he looks like. Any rumors imported speak of him as a demon or monster, and so any talismans purporting to show his features show him as such—talismans Wei Ying had decorated his cave with, and which Lan Wangji has successfully convinced him to allow him to remove. As infamous and reviled as Wei Ying is, he has managed to stay anonymous outside the gentry, anonymity that affords him some safety, and Lan Wangji would rather it not be shattered by one of Jiang Wanyin’s temper tantrums. 

They are led to a courtyard, and though Jiang Wanyin first tries to close the door to keep Lan Wangji and Wen Ning out, he is able to stop this by blocking the shutting door with his sheathed sword. The Jiang sect heir must see something in the narrowing of Lan Wangji’s eyes, because he doesn’t attempt it again, instead closing and locking the door behind them. 

Aside from a single figure in a long black cloak, they are alone, and Lan Wangji is unsurprised but pleased when it turns out to be Jiang Yanli in her wedding robes and headdress, come to show Wei Ying so he is not completely left out—he has seen his husband’s pain over this, how much he misses the sister who raised him, knows she is as close to his blood as can be, and he hopes this eases it somewhat. 

Lan Wangji can feel Wei Ying’s arms drooping under the weight of A-Yuan, so he carefully takes the boy from him so he can greet his sister.

“A-Xian,” she calls him, untying the cloak and letting it fall. “What do you think?”

He’s close enough to hear Wei Ying’s breath catch, and is taken back to his disappointment over being excluded from the wedding. He himself is reminded of seeing Wei Ying in red following the Sunshot Campaign, in his underrobes after waking for a coma, the only time he has seen him in only in red. He realizes with a pang he will never see his husband in wedding robes. 

“What, she’s not marrying you.”

Jiang Wanyin’s snide tone grates on Lan Wangji, but Wei Ying responds in kind, and he recalls watching them snipe verbally at each other during the lecture in Cloud Recesses, back before the world fell apart. 

Jiang Yanli calms them, and he marvels at her ability to bring them together as they try to convince her she looks lovely in her wedding garb. 

“You’ll only believe it if he says it,” Wei Ying says, faking petulance. “Lan Zhan, what do you think?”

He had been trying to avert his eyes politely, but even Jiang Wanyin seems to be watching for his reaction, so he studies them, the delicate stitching, the fall of the layers. 

Lan Wangji wishes he could see Wei Ying in wedding robes. 

“Elegant,” he says with a nod.

“Zhan-gege, who’s Pretty-jiejie?” A-Yuan asks, twisting in his hold.

Wei Ying smiles at the boy, taking him back.

“Even A-Yuan knows you’re pretty, shijie, so you don’t need to worry.”

Jiang Yanli folds the cloak and gestures to the nearby table. 

“Come now, I’ve made soup.”

When Wei Ying sits, Jiang Yanli’s expression shifts to surprise, and he notices her looking at his forehead ribbon in his hair. She looks to him, a question in her expression, and he simply nods. Her responding smile is filled with relief, but also regret. 

He is surprised when she doesn’t address it immediately, instead gesturing to him to sit and opening the basket. He takes a seat beside Wei Ying. The smell of the soup fills the air, a scent unfamiliar to Lan Wangji, but one that reminds him of his husband. This, he realizes, must be the lotus root and pork rib soup he has heard him talk about. 

“I apologize. I only have three bowls,” she says, sounding truly disappointed. “I did not expect…”

Lan Wangji is about to demur and insist he does not intend to eat when Jiang Wanyin, surprisingly, pulls out a pouch of money.

“We can purchase a couple from the market, A-jie.”

Wen Ning bows.

“Jiang-zongzhu, Jiang-guniang, I can g-go for you.”

Jiang Wanyin frowns at Wen Ning with thinly veiled hostility that baffles Lan Wangji, but hands him some silver.

As Wen Ning flees, he wonders if it is to avoid Jiang Wanyin, or to avoid being present for at least part of the conversation to come. 

He knows Wei Ying would prefer to flee, and he strokes his arm briefly with his thumb. The smile he receives from his husband is tremulous, but he can see his determination. 

Jiang Yanli smiles at A-Yuan, her attention drawn by the movement.

“Who is this little one?” she asks, crouching slightly so she’s at the child’s height.

“A-Yuan is A-Yuan, Pretty-jiejie!”

Wei Ying shifts, catching his hand briefly and squeezing it; Lan Wangji realizes he’s decided to start here, with A-Yuan, in the multitude of revelations that are to be made. 

“A-Yuan, this is my shijie,” he says softly. “You can call her guma.”

Jiang Yanli gasps in delight when A-Yuan dutifully calls her guma.

“A-Xian, is he yours?”

She is obviously unable to take him into her arms, wearing her wedding robes as she is, but she reaches out to take A-Yuan’s hand. 

“Not by blood, but he started calling me a-die.”

He offers a wan smile to both his siblings.

“Meet Wei Yuan. Or he will be, once I’ve introduced him properly to my parents.”

“He’s a Wen,” Jiang Wanyin states.

Lan Wangji levels him with a stare, though it’s unclear in his tone how he feels. 

“He’s an orphan and he’s three years old,” Wei Ying shoots back.

Jiang Wanyin’s face softens, but Jiang Yanli looks alarmed.

“A-Xian, he was at the work camp? At Qiongqi Path?”

Her face hardens when he nods.

“The children, the civilians, all were supposed to be let go. How could they…?”

Lan Wangji stays silent, knowing Wei Ying would prefer to shield her from some of the uglier realities of the war, but is reminded of coming upon Jin Zixun shooting unarmed civilians in chains, and his lie that it was sanctioned by the Lan and Nie clans. 

“I couldn’t leave them there, shijie,” he whispers. “Wen Ning and Wen Qing sheltered us, and the others were held as Wen Ruohan’s hostages against her during the war.”

A-Yuan is watching Wei Ying quietly, with the same air of concern he had at the restaurant in Yiling not so many days ago. Lan Wangji shifts again to put the child on Wei Ying’s lap, watching as the boy hugs him.

Wei Ying manages a smile for him, then leans his head close to him and points to Jiang Wanyin.

“And the fussy gege is your shushu,” he says conspiratorially. 

“You—!” 

Jiang Yanli silences Jiang Wanyin with a look.

“Like Ning-shushu?” A-Yuan asks. “Do I call him nao-shushu?”

“That’s your Jiang-shushu,” Wei Ying clarifies before Jiang Cheng can take offense, but nearly chokes on the title and falls quiet.

Lan Wangji remembers abruptly that Wei Ying had once referred to Jiang Fengmian by that very name, and he watches his husband in concern. He has expressed feeling as though the attack on Lotus Pier was his fault, and he can see the guilt and grief Wei Ying is struggling to hold back. 

“Yes,” Jiang Wanyin says, his voice strained as though he is fighting his own emotional turmoil, ending an awkward silence. “You can call me Jiang-shushu.”

When A-Yuan does, it is perhaps the closest Lan Wangji has ever seen Jiang Wanyin come to smiling. 

Wen Ning returns with several bowls and soup spoons, an inexpensive wooden variety they have at the Burial Mounds. He tries to give Jiang Wanyin his change and is waved off.

“You can use it to get something sweet for… for my zhizi,” he says, his tone brusque. “Or a toy or something.”

Wei Ying smiles, his posture relaxing just slightly—A-Yuan’s acceptance by his siblings as their nephew has eased his nerves somewhat. But this is only the first of three difficult revelations that must be made, and arguably the easiest of them. 

Jiang Yanli serves each of them, putting a generous portion of meat in A-Yuan’s bowl, and takes a seat. She herself is not eating, likely concerned about staining her wedding robes. Instead she seems content to watch them eat.

Wei Ying alternates between himself and A-Yuan, one spoon each.

“Be sure to chew the lotus root,” Wen Ning tells the boy softly. 

A-Yuan nods enthusiastically, clearly enamored of the flavors; Lan Wangji can’t blame him. Though there is more spice than he is accustomed to, as is the norm in Yunmeng cuisine, the flavor is somehow warm and comforting. He completely understands how this soup is his husband’s favorite. 

“You’re not eating,” Jiang Yanli says. 

Wen Ning jerks in surprise.

“Oh… I was going to save this for jiejie so she could try it.”

Jiang Yanli smiles warmly.

“We will be coming to Burial Mounds, once I change at the inn. I brought enough ingredients to make some for everyone.”

Wei Ying nearly chokes on a bite of soup. She pats his back until he’s recovered.

“Wen Qing sent me a letter. We have things to discuss.”

Jiang Wanyin looks sour about this.

“Speaking of, Zewu-Jun sent an interesting letter. Said you have news to share. I’m assuming it has to do with why Hanguang-Jun is here?”

Wei Ying puts his soup spoon down and hands A-Yuan off to Wen Ning with his bowl. Wen Ning doesn’t seem surprised by this and takes over feeding him. 

He tries not to be nervous over his husband getting the boy out of the potential line of fire. He rather hopes it is unnecessary, but he has seen Jiang Wanyin’s temper.

“About that,” Wei Ying says, then pauses, glancing at Lan Wangji. “Um, well… We’re married.”

For a moment, there is stunned hurt on Jiang Wanyin’s features, but it’s quickly replaced by wrath, powerful enough that zidian sparks.

“You couldn’t even invite us?!”

Lan Wangji will not have him blame Wei Ying for that. He knows there will be enough of that when they get to the next revelation. He would rather the focus be on him.

“He did not know we were married until recently.”

Jiang Wanyin’s eyes snap to him, and he carefully keeps his gaze cool in response to what is almost a volcano. He sputters, almost too angry to speak, zidian sparking even more dangerously, leaving the scent of ozone in the air. 

“You— Without his consent?! This, from the honorable Hanguang-Jun?!”

“Jiang Wanyin!”

Wei Ying’s voice is low and cutting, startlingly powerful despite the lack of volume. It’s enough to startle his brother out of his anger, at least momentarily.

“He handfasted me in the Cold Spring cave,” he explains. “Lan Yi’s guqin was attacking me because I wasn’t Lan.”

Jiang Yanli stands and levels a look at Jiang Wanyin that somehow makes him quail; Lan Wangji only understands why when she levels it at him—the fury of a mother figure.

“Please explain, Lan-er-gongzi.”

Her voice is clipped in the same manner it was when she chastised Jin Zixun at the Phoenix Mountain hunt, and leaves no doubt that she will find a way to harm him if his explanation is deemed unsatisfactory. She is mildly terrifying.

“Wei Ying was being attacked with Chord Assassination,” he says. “The headband would afford him protection. I did not expect Lan Yi’s appearance. Or that we would bow. Regardless, I did not regret it.”

“You married him by accident?” Jiang Wanyin mutters, the rage gone and replaced with confusion.

“Lan Yi did not disapprove.”

“And you never told A-Xian?” Jiang Yanli asks.

She also seems more confused than angry now. 

Wei Ying sighs tiredly.

“Aiya, Jiang Cheng, shijie… When would he have had time? When we were searching for the yin iron? Indoctrination? The Xuanwu cave? After—”

He breaks off. His siblings look pained, remembering the fate of Lotus Pier, though they don’t know what came after for Wei Ying. Yet. 

“There was never time,” Lan Wangji agrees. “I did not expect my regard for him to be reciprocated. But now, with the danger to Wei Ying… even were it solely political, I could help protect him.”

“It’s not solely political,” Wei Ying chirps, his tone almost smug. “It’s very reciprocated—and can’t be annulled now!”

Lan Wangji can feel his ears heating. Just under Wei Ying’s collar lurks the proof of that, as he’s been acutely aware all day. He has to avoid looking at him for a moment—not out of embarrassment, but because if he does, if he sees the heat in Wei Ying’s gaze, he might lose control and kiss him in front of his siblings. 

As much as his husband might prefer the distraction, he doubts it will help much. 

“I didn’t need to know that, ever,” Jiang Wanyin grouses, making a face. 

Jiang Yanli takes her seat again, her face serious.

“A-Xian is in danger?”

Lan Wangji nods. 

“The rumors make him out to be a monster raising an army of Wen cultivators, as though he is an enemy. The truth is quite different. The lies Jin Guangshan has spread to imply he disrespects Jiang Wanyin were meant to isolate him. They want the amulet.”

“Wait, what’s this about me not respecting Jiang Cheng?” Wei Ying demands, clearly affronted.

“One of the claims made after Qiongqi Path,” Lan Wangji tells him. “That you were speaking ill of Jiang Wanyin at the Phoenix Mountain hunt.”

Wei Ying looks stunned, and his gaze darts to his brother. He evidently doesn’t like what he sees, his expression shuttering. 

“I see,” he says, the words heavy in the air. “And you believed them.”

Jiang Wanyin has the decency to look ashamed. 

Jiang Yanli seems at a loss. Lan Wangji suspects she has heard none of this. Had she been aware, he has no doubt the offenders would have regretted speaking ill of Wei Ying. 

“Maybe you’re right not to trust me,” Wei Ying murmurs finally. “I’ve lied to both of you.”

The admission startles a flinch from his siblings. Lan Wangji can feel the tension in Wei Ying, like a guqin string stretched too taut, ready to snap at the slightest touch. He reaches for Wei Ying’s hand under the table and places his on top of it. He is relieved when his husband relaxes slightly, a slight tremor running through him. 

Wei Ying’s hand, when he laces theirs together, is clammy and cold, his grip tighter than normal. As much as Lan Wangji wishes he could do more, the best he can do is be here for him. 

The quiet stretches, seeming to freeze them in time, broken only when A-Yuan asks Wen Ning for another bite of soup. 

Jiang Yanli reaches forward, touches Wei Ying’s arm. 

“About what, A-Xian?”

She looks concerned and a little afraid, and the same look lurks on Jiang Wanyin’s features. They know, Lan Wangji realizes that Wei Ying has been hiding something, maybe even suspect how terrible it is. Whatever they might imagine, he knows the truth will be much worse. 

Wei Ying swallows hard, his fingers tightening. He seems to be trying to find the words, deciding how to say it in a way that might soften the blow. 

But there is no way to soften it. 

“I didn’t know how to find Baoshan Sanren,” he admits finally.

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The conversation is a lot longer than I expected it to be, and this is a good stopping point, even if it is a bit of a cliffhanger. This went in directions I didn’t always expect, in part because Jiang Yanli is terrifying.

Lan Wangji has feelings about Jiang Cheng. They’re not always the nicest feelings, but he has them regardless. It’s ok, because Jiang Cheng has similar feelings in return.

It might take me a bit to pick this up again. I’m participating in the WangXian Lunar New Year gift exchange, so I’m working on my piece for that and putting my other fics on hold for a little while. Also, the new semester just started, and I’ve probably fielded about 50 emails from panicked students today alone.

[canadian-riddler]

Hi Indy! I know Arkhamverse Riddler is definitely your specialty. Do you happen to have a rough ranking of Riddlers that you like from most to least? And which do you think is the most definitive version of the character?

I THINK that’s what my blog description says, anyway

Yes, at all times I have a rough ranking floating around in the back of my mind.  It is going to be very long so I will answer the last question first.

For most definitive version of Riddler I’m going to have to go with BTAS.  No recurring villain really had a distinct personality from their original (1940s) version, and while I am not knocking Frank Gorshin the 1966 Riddler absolutely was a bit Joker-y.  Most importantly (if I am not mistaken, which I could be), BTAS gave Riddler what became his most important trait: his intelligence.  Before that he was mostly an average weirdo who wore a green suit (sometimes) and liked riddles and sometimes built puzzle traps.  After BTAS, though, the Riddler’s intelligence became the driving force of his character.  Batman ‘66 saved Riddler from obscurity, but BTAS made him both relevant and future-proof.  Will we ever see a Riddler of average intelligence who doesn’t specialise in computer programming/engineering ever again?  I doubt it, and that’s because of BTAS. 

Onto the list.  It does not include EVERY Riddler ever because I have not read every Riddler story ever, but it should cover most of them (or at least the ones you’ve probably heard of).

1. Anything Paul Dini wrote.  This actually covers a few different Riddlers, which would be the first two Arkhamverse games, the most notable PI Riddler stuff, and of course the Riddler from BTAS.  Paul Dini can write the Riddler as both being a bad person and sympathetic at the same time, which is actually harder to pull off than it sounds.  AND he does it without using backstory as a crutch, which really is hard.

2.  Jeph Loeb/Jim Lee’s Riddler from Hush.  He only actually appears for two issues, but it’s one of the best Riddler stories merely because it allows him to do all the things Riddler SHOULD be able to do, but can’t because then there would be no Batman comics because he would have ended them.  619C is also, in my opinion, the best Riddler cover of all time.

3. Jim Carrey’s Riddler from Batman Forever.  Why would I put him this high on the list, you ask?  Because some writers forget that the Riddler is half just in it to have a good time and he doesn’t really care about how other people perceive him.  This man is living his best life and he’s doing it in glittery spandex and a light-up jacket.  Is he over the top?  At the time, no, not really.  At the time Riddler kinda just acted like that.  And he should be able to do so, in my opinion. 

4. Current Riddler (James Tynion IV).  While this Riddler has some issues with consistency (though this probably has to do with being shuffled from a main comic story into a Catwoman story), he returns to being almost self-cripplingly paranoid and absolutely losing it when he’s bested, which I think are important traits for Riddler to have.  I’m also actually really amused that they gave him the Batman Forever hair.

5. Batman ‘66.  While it did likely rescue Riddler from pending obscurity - he actually never appeared in a Batman comic before 1965, and before that was featured in only two issues of Detective Comics - and he definitely checks the ‘charming’ and ‘having fun’ boxes, there isn’t a whole lot differentiating him from the Joker he’s playing alongside.  If you watch the Batman ‘66 movie they’re almost the exact same character, just one likes jokes and the other likes riddles. 

6. Hush Returns and its aftermath.  This stuff is weird and doesn’t make a whole lot of sense because it mostly involves Riddler running away from Hush and retcons certain things from Hush, most importantly the part where Riddler got everyone to work together because he gave them what they wanted.  Hush Returns (which also contradicts itself during the story) for some reason has everyone angry at Riddler for tricking them and it ends with him getting the shit beat out of him and puts him into a coma for a year, which leads into him getting total amnesia and becoming a PI.  That’s the reason it’s so high on the list.  The story is weird and makes no sense at all for any of the other characters in it either but it gave us a reason for PI Riddler and that makes it matter.  Sort of.

7. Brave and the Bold/The Batman Riddler.  I’m putting them both together mostly because BatB Riddler features in I think only one episode and he deserves a mention because he’s adorable.  TB Riddler was an interesting experiment into a Riddler that, for whatever reason, never really came into himself as a person and instead sort of enacts revenge for his existence on life.  If I remember correctly he’s also pretty low-key about his intelligence, which is another interesting character choice.  I respect the things they went for but this Riddler overall gives me the impression of a person who always says no when invited to something but gets upset when people stop asking which, while definitely something the Riddler would do, isn’t really my preferred take.

8. Snyder Riddler (New 52).  The problem I have with this Riddler is that I have no idea what his motivation even is.  I was told a long time ago that a backstory for him WAS written but didn’t make it into Zero Year because the story was already too long, which is... not a great look for a professional storyteller.  And because we don’t know anything about this Riddler, this story consists of a dude who wears green to impress women (which he never shows any interest in), gets the mob to work for him... somehow... and decides to spend a YEAR watching the people in Gotham die because... I’m not sure?  If it amused him, sure, I could understand that.  But he just seems super bored during the entirety of the story.  He doesn’t even seem particularly excited when Batman actually shows up in front of him.  Beyond Zero Year his appearances are, to my knowledge, limited mostly to two issues in Batman Eternal, where he’s hiding, three issues of The Flash, where he speedruns Zero Year and is undone by the Flash villains teaming up against him (which I don’t know enough about Flash villains to comment on), and Scarecrow 23.2, where he for some unexplained reason seems to look up to Scarecrow.  And then there’s Detective Comics: Future’s End, which is just the worst thing ever.  Snyder didn’t write all of these stories, but they are based on his Riddler.

9. Gotham Riddler.  I didn’t watch past season 3 so I can’t comment on too much after that, but the arc with Mad Grey Dawn and ‘I knew that you knew that I knew’ was some of the greatest Riddler stuff we had gotten in years and if they had just kept on with that they would have had one of the greatest Riddlers of all time. 

10. Jeph Loeb/Tim Sale Riddler.  Full disclaimer I haven’t read Catwoman: When in Rome, but I have read The Long Halloween and Dark Victory.  The reason I don’t like this Riddler is because he actually bears no resemblance to him.  He’s a literal moron who just stumbles around incompetently for the duration of his relevance to the plot.  It’s like they decided to make an ironic Riddler who is actually stupid and also for the first time in his life does not have the ability to locate a tailor.  I don’t actually understand the point of this Riddler’s existence.  He isn’t even really Riddler, he’s just some sort of vaguely Riddler-coloured person.

[fourteendaysinaweek]

Show Recommendations

Grimm

Platform: Amazon Prime

Official overview: Portland detective Nick Burkhardt, descended from a long line of warriors known as Grimms, defends his city from magical creatures known as Wesen, which are part human and part animal. Fighting alongside his partner, Hank, colleague Sergeant Wu and friends Monroe and Rosalee, Nick faces off against internal and external forces, including his police captain, Sean Renard.

My overview: Portland detective Nick Burkhardt thinks he's going insane when he randomly starts seeing monsters at the time his aunt goes into a coma. Turns out he's not, in fact, going crazy. He deals with shit trying to kill him and his girlfriend and friends CONSTANTLY and in reality all he wants to do his keep his city safe, and he accidentally saves the world in the process.

Thoughts on the show: I love it, it does have a habit of setting up for recurring characters and then never mentioning them again, so that's annoying. There are 6 seasons. There are some great romances in the show, and also some iffy ones, but the iffy ones are definitely regarded as such in the show, and eventually either develop past the weird stage or die before anymore harm can be done. Aired from 2011 to 2017

Thoughts on the fandom: Wayyyy too small, I know of 0 people around my age who like it, and 90% of the fan base is obsessed with Sasha Roiz who plays Sean Renard (not that I'm judging). Definitely not enough fics out there, and the ones that I've found seem to be poorly written or basically just pwp.

Warehouse 13

Platform: Amazon Prime

Official overview: Following an abrupt transfer, Secret Service agents Pete Lattimer and Myka Bering find themselves in the middle of South Dakota at a massive, top-secret storage warehouse that holds every strange artifact, mysterious relic, out-of-this-world object and supernatural souvenir ever found by the U.S. government. Lattimer and Bering's new task, as directed by the warehouse's caretaker, longtime agent Artie Nielsen, is to investigate reports of unexplainable and paranormal activity in an effort to secure more peculiar and dangerous objects, and to help Artie manage the warehouse itself.

My overview: imagine the TARDIS except it's a warehouse and not a police box (bigger on the inside) and it's full of cursed objects to be kept there so it doesn't destroy the world.

Thoughts on the show: I love it. It accurately depicts trauma and has decent representation such as a black woman everyone is intimidated by because she's the boss, a gay man who isn't sexualized and has development and a personality other than "gay". There is even an incredibly homoerotic friendship between two women that the actress of said women played up because they wanted their characters together, even if one turned out to be not-so-good. The show deals with sexism and victims of neglect. You'll learn a lot of random history while watching the show as all of the artifacts tend to be historically based (the guillotine blade that cut of Marie Antoinette's head, for instance). There are 5 seasons and I'm s3 or 4. Apparently the show does something weird with Pete and Myka at the end, which probably means they get together. Ran 2009 to 2014.

Thoughts on the fandom: again, way too small, although a lot bigger than Grimm. There are quite a few fics out there, mainly for the two women which I ship with my whole heart. There might be some controversy with Eddie McClintock (Pete Lattimer) but I'm not very well-versed in it. I wish Grimm's fandom was as big as W13's.

The Umbrella Academy

Platform: Netflix

Official overview: On one day in 1989, 43 infants are inexplicably born to random, unconnected women who showed no signs of pregnancy the day before. Seven are adopted by billionaire industrialist Sir Reginald Hargreeves, who creates the Umbrella Academy and prepares his "children" to save the world. In their teenage years, though, the family fractures and the team disbands. Fast forward to the present time, when the six surviving members of the clan reunite upon the news of Hargreeves' passing. They work together to solve a mystery surrounding their father's death, but divergent personalities and abilities again pull the estranged family apart, and a global apocalypse is another imminent threat. The series is based on a collection of comics and graphic novels created and written by My Chemical Romance lead singer Gerard Way.

My overview: adult survivors of abuse with increasingly weird/out-there superpowers due to the weird circumstances of their birth come together to celebrate *cough* I mean mourn the passing of their "father" And accidentally cause the apocalypse.

Thoughts on the show: I love it. I've finished season 2,currenfly there are only 2 seasons, it's still in progress, I love it. I'm sure most of you have already watched it because what is the supernatural fandom if not emo? Also a good one for representation. Mexican man with a stutter, black woman with a daughter she is in a custody battle for, gay druggie veteran, Ellen Page, Asian ghost boy, 58 year old man in a 13 year old's body, and a half-chimp man.

Thoughts on the fandom: big. Big big big. Haven't found any fics that cater to my specific wants in a fic, but there are fics. Some of them have weird pairings, but since the show made two (adopted) siblings canon, I can't exactly blame them.

Lost Girl

Platform: I actually have no idea

Official overview: Bo is a small-town girl on the run after a disastrous sexual encounter with her boyfriend ends with his death. Bo learns that she is not human, but a succubus, who feeds on the sexual energy of humans. She and her kind are members of the Fae, creatures of legend, who walk among humans and feed off them in different ways. As she searches for the truth about her origins and runs from her inhuman urges, she vows to help those she meets along the way -- human or Fae -- who need to right a wrong.

My overview: bisexual woman finds out she's a succubus and she has to choose to be either good Fae or bad Fae (I think it's light vs dark but it's been a Hot Minute) she has a thing with a werewolf and also a thing with a Fae doctor who is human and a woman.

Thoughts on the show: it's good, 5 seasons, don't think I've finished the first season. Back when I started watching it it was on Netflix and has since been removed. It's on Vudo but it costs money which is bullshit. It's a little weird at first, but I like it. Ran 2010 to 2015.

Thoughts on the fandom: have not interacted with the fandom for fear of spoilers. I'd imagine this show's fandom is about the size of Grimm.

Being Human (USA version)

Platform: again, I don't know.

Official overview: "Being Human," based on a BBC series of the same name, features three 20-something roommates who each try to keep a secret from the rest of the world -- one is a ghost, another is a vampire and the third is a werewolf. The three roomies try to help one another navigate the complexities of living double lives.

My overview: again, weird starts off in almost the middle of the story. It deals with abuse, death, fighting urges, dealing with past sins, and, well, being human. The characters are Sally (Ghost) Aidan (vampire) and Josh (werewolf). The three of them are trying to live like normal, Aidan and Josh as workers at the local hospital as Sally works to deal with her death.

Thoughts on the show: I love it I just wish I could find it on a reliable site, again, it's on Vudo but it costs money. It definitely had the set up for a good mlm relationship but from what I've gathered they end up forcing heterosexuality.

Thoughts on the fandom: again, too small, roughly the size of Grimm. I have seen 0 fics.

The Librarians

Platform: Hulu I do so believe

Official overview: Cued by TNT's popular 'The Librarian' trilogy, this series introduces new members of an ancient group protecting mystical artefacts. Hidden below the Metropolitan Public Library, the secret society's longtime leader is Flynn Carsen, whose job has become very complicated. To help, the Library recruits Eve, a counterterrorism agent responsible for organizational security; Jacob, who has encyclopedic knowledge of art, architecture and history; Cassandra, who links auditory/sensory hallucinations to memory; and Ezekiel, a skilled thief and master technician. Overseeing them is Jenkins, the reclusive caretaker of the Library's sleepy little outpost in Oregon. Noah Wyle executive produces and recurs as Flynn, the role he played in the movie series.

My overview: very similar to W13. This time imagine the Bunker, and the Warehouse, and boom, you've got the Library.

Thoughts on the show: good! I love it, I just found out it was on Hulu and am going to be binging it as soon as I finish Grimm and Warehouse. I'd love to see a crossover between W13 and The Librarians I feel like they'd have a feud.

Thoughts on the fandom: probably the same size as W13 if not bigger as the series came from movies. Again, haven't finished the series so I haven't interacted with the fandom.

Eureka

Platform: Amazon Prime

Official overview: In the years since World War II, the U.S. government has been relocating the world's geniuses (and their families) to the Pacific Northwest town of Eureka. Daily life there shifts between amazing innovation and total chaos. U.S. Marshal Jack Carter learns this first-hand when his car breaks down in Eureka, stranding him among the town's eccentric citizens. When they unleash a scientific creation still unknown to the outside world, it's up to Carter to restore order. Subsequently, he's let in on one of America's best-kept secrets.

My overview: a small town but make every person a genius. Has some crossover with Warehouse 13, they exist in the same universe.

Thoughts on the show: I love it so far. Just the kind of weird shit I enjoy.

Thoughts on the fandom: I'd imagine about the size of Warehouse 13's but I've yet to interact considering I'm still in season 1.

[dawnwave16]

Gamer Girl pt 2!

part 1; part 2; part 3; part 4

AO3 link

Part 2 and 3 were meant to be one chapter and it wasn’t supposed to get this long but here we are! 

Story:

When Marinette walked into the Bakery so soon after having left for school, Sabine knew something was wrong. For one thing, Marinette tried not to miss school if she didn't have to, the last time she had gone to school only to come back home was a particularly bad day when Marinette was nine. For another, Marinette didn't even bother to greet her simply walking past her and up the stairs without a word.

“Marinette?” Sabine called tentatively after her daughter. “Maman, with all due respect I need to calm down right now before I speak to anyone.” Came the terse reply from her daughter's retreating form. “I'm going to see if I can go into full dive and join Kirito and the others for a while. When I'm calm I'll tell you what happened.” Sabine exchanged a look with Nadja, who had just walked in and shrugged. If Marinette asked for time to calm down first, it had to be something bad but both women knew there was nothing they could do until Marinette was ready to talk. * * * * * * * Marinette waited for Tikki to climb out of her bag before she tossed it onto the chaise with her backpack joining it shortly after. She had just taken her jacket off when a voice echoed in her mind. “Lady Morning, I am-” “Yeah, I know who you are Hawkmoth and the answer is no. I am in no mood to deal with you or anyone else except those who truly would understand how I'm feeling right now. If you try to akumatize anyone else since I'm saying no, then I will track you down and I will make you feel all the pain I'm feeling right now.” Marinette growled at the villain. “Just for future reference, Ladybug will be told who you are because I've recognised your voice Gabriel Agreste! So leave me alone or it won't be Ladybug you have to worry about!” Tikki watched from her vantage point as Marinette fought off the Akuma that had flown into her jacket and listened in growing horrified pride as Marinette stood up not to Hawkmoth but to the person she had once looked up to. She hadn't known about the connection between Hawkmoth and Gabriel and under normal circumstances, Marinette wouldn't have been recognised his voice either. It seemed her anger was so potent at that moment that it burned away the magic that normally hid that sort of detail. Tikki watched as the dark purple butterfly escaped from the jacket Marinette was holding and quickly swooped down and purified it. She looked at Marinette's face but seeing the tears making their way down Marinette's cheeks, she decided to simply eat the offered cookie and return to her nest to watch over her chosen. Marinette, now free to feel, let herself cry for a bit before checking with Yui to see if her group was online and quickly joining them. * * * * * * * * * * * * When Marinette had stormed out of the classroom, the class had taken a moment to process what had just happened before turning to Max and Markov for clarification about what Marinette had said. It took him a moment to find the information but when he did his face paled and he ran for the rubbish bin and threw up. “Max?” Mlle Bustier asked softly. Max was quiet as he processed what he had just read further then he turned and faced the class. “We messed up. Big time. When Marinette said that people died from the game, she wasn't lying. That 'game' was called Sword Art Online or SAO to most people. Anyway, on the day it launched 10 000 people logged on only to find they couldn't log out. To people not logged on it looked like the people who were, were simply in a coma. It wasn't until after everyone had logged on that a message was released saying that if the people that had logged on wanted to survive, they had to clear the game. If they died in-game, they died for real because the headset, or NerveGear as it was called, they used would fry their brains.” Max closed his eyes and fought the urge to vomit again, his face was still ashen when he opened his eyes and looked at the class. “If the family members of someone who had logged in tried to remove the NerveGear, it would kill the person in full dive anyway. 3,853. That's how many people died in the game or through people trying to remove the players NerveGear. Over half of that was in the first month!” Max sank to the floor as his legs gave out from shock. “I can't believe Marinette was one of the ones that survived. From the video, we can guess that she was really strong but the other players we saw must have been strong too...” His voice trailed off as he thought about what his classmate must have gone through. Several members of the class nodded in agreement with his words. Suddenly Chloe spoke up. “Wait how long were they stuck in the game?” “I don't see how that's relevant Chloe but to answer your question two years two days one hour and fifty-five minutes. The extra day comes from the fact that 2024 was a leap year.” Max said softly. Chloe closed her eyes as though she was in pain. “Fuck! How did she not lose her temper with me?! I've bullied her for how long now about being clumsy but after that long in a coma, of course, she is going to be clumsy!” The class stared at Chloe in shock and even Mlle Bustier didn't say anything. Alya had her eyes on her phone and her hand was flying over a page she had next to her as she went over all the information she could find about SAO, presumably for a new story for her blog so she missed Chloe's statement completely. “She's stronger than the rest of us that's for sure,” Adrien's voice was soft but seemed to echo around the silent room. “What do you mean Adrian?” Chloe asked for once using his name instead of one of her twisted nicknames for him. “Think about it. Not only did she survive SAO but she is one of the few people who has never been Akumatised. Even with everything Lila and this class has done to her she has avoided Hawkmoth's notice. As we are yet to get an alarm saying there is an Akuma on the loose now, I think it's safe to say that she hasn't been Akumatised today either. Any of us would have been a prime target in Marinette's state but there's nothing so far.” Adrien's voice was still soft as he explained his logic and he was surprised when he saw a number of his classmates' nod in agreement with what he was saying. He was about to say more when there was a knock on the door and a smartly dressed man walked into the room. “Pardon the intrusion so early in the morning, I am Jean-François Thévenet. I'm one of the members of the school board. We were in the principal's office for our annual meeting when we all received a rather interesting email. Due to the nature of the contents of this email, we have decided that a formal investigation has to be launched.” The man paused as he took in the various looks of surprise and disbelief on each of the class members faces. His brown eyes cataloguing everything he was seeing with an impassive expression. “The results of this investigation will be determined by the findings. Now, each of your parents have been call and as such we have obtained permission to interview you all. Some parents have requested that an adult other than ourselves be in the room and we have agreed so long as they don't interfere with the investigation. To be clear, we have a very good record of what has been happening in this class for the past six months, all we want is the clarification of why it has happened and why it wasn't brought to our attention before now. Interviews will be done in a random order, so will Rose Lavillant follow me.” He didn't give anyone a chance to react, turning on his heel and walking out of the room with Rose scrambling to catch up to him. Whispers broke out as soon as the two were out of the classes eyesight as Caline Bustier stood in shock. An investigation? Six months? What was going on? As far as she knew, that morning was the first time anything untoward had happened in her classroom. Eventually, she managed to shake her thought clear and start the much-delayed lesson on the french revolution. * * * * * * * * * * * * When Yui had sent him a message to let him know that Suiren (Waterlily aka Marinette) would be joining him online shortly, Kirito had been confused. She was in Paris which meant that if he had the time conversion correct, she should be in school at that moment. His confusion Vanished the moment he saw her. “Suiren! Are you alright? Silly question, never mind.” Without giving her a chance to reply he pulled her into his arms. “I'm here, let it out,” he murmured to which the only reaction was her burying her face into his avatars chest and bursting into tears. They stayed like that even as the rest of the group arrived thanks to Yui calling them. Kirito slowly ran his hand up and down her back in comfort even as he looked at his friends in confusion. It was at the moment that Suiren murmured something that had Yui nodding. “Sui-chan said I could show you what has her so upset and why she isn't at school. I'm just glad that I copied myself to her phone!” Without further ado, a large screen appeared hovering in mid-air that showed Suiren as he everyday self walking into her class. It showed her teachers actions and Marinette's reactions. It skipped over playing the video of that fateful battle though, for which Suiren was grateful. She didn't think any of the people present needed to see that video. Instead, it skipped to Marinette telling her teacher off and carried on from there giving those present a view of what was carrying on in her class at that moment. Suiren turned to Yui. “How are you doing that?” “I tapped into the camera's you had the school install in every classroom after that Lila girl almost got you expelled.” Yui chirped happily. Suiren was quiet for a moment. “What are you thinking, Suiren?” Kirito asked her quietly. “That I'm honestly sick of Paris. I understand that it is where my parents are but I am the only person

at my school that went through SAO and I'm beginning to feel completely alone. I was never one to enjoy being the centre of attention and I feel like if the people I thought were my friends were truly my friends, they wouldn't have been swayed by Lila.” Suiren's voice was soft as she spoke, almost as though she was trying to work through an idea as she spoke. “I think I'm going to talk to my parents about the possibility of me moving to Japan and joining the school they set up for SAO survivors in order to make sure I'm at the right level educationally. I can always attend the Tokyo branch of ESMOD and most of the people I design for live in Japan anyway. Those that don't live in Japan, travel to it now and then for work much as they do to Paris so it's not like that's an issue.” “Want me to talk to Kikuoka to see if he can pull some strings? He owes me a couple of favours anyway...” Kirito offered, and after a pause, Suiren nodded. “I think that might be best. This is the last week of the current school term so I'll stay in Paris for another month and get everything sorted out that needs to be sorted out. I'll also need to talk to my parents. Yui if you could send what you've found to my home computer that would be a great help in convincing them to let me go!” With that plan settled the group moved to an area where they could do some mat collection for both Liz and Suiren as they had been talking about upgrading their gear for them. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * The investigation that was going on at Collège Françoise Dupont had been slightly brutal in Marinette's opinion, even if it had had to be that way in order to get the full truth to be revealed. M. Damocles had tried to protest against the investigation and the board had eventually had to threaten to suspend him before he had reluctantly stepped aside and let them have access to everything that they needed. The interviews with her class as well as some of the other classes had gone about as well as the board had expected though and they hadn't been impressed by their findings. They were, even more, displeased when they had finally managed to contact Lila's mother. When the board had first tried to contact Mrs Signora Rossi they had been puzzled as to why her phone kept going to voice mail. As Alya was Lila's friend they asked if she had Signora Rossi's number on the off chance. She didn't but she willing handed Lila's number over to the board and when they compared it to the number they had for Signora Rossi they found that the two numbers were the same. So the board did the next best thing since Lila had said her mother was a diplomat for the Italian Embassy, they phoned them and asked to speak to her. Once again that failed to bring the desired result as there was no Signora Rossi registered as working for the Italian Embassy as a diplomat or otherwise. It took them two days but they eventually found her working long hours as a waitress in an out of the way restaurant. She had been shocked when she had been asked about everything that Lila had said or done as well as Lila's frequent 'trips' and 'illnesses'. It was only through sheer luck that Mr Pigeon had struck at that moment instead of her being akumatised. She had been absolutely devastated to find out that while she was working two jobs to give her daughter a better life than her own, that same daughter was lying through her teeth as though she was ashamed of her. Once that had been discovered, the board had taken a closer look at all the documents that Lila had given the school. These ranged from various doctors notes to letters that had supposedly come from her mother regarding her trips abroad. Once they had been check thoroughly they had set to work on trying to get hold of Lila who had proved to be most slippery. In the end, the board had simply handed her file over to the truancy office and made sure that she would be held back a grade due to all her absences and the sheer amount of work that Lila had had her classmates do for her. In the end, Lila's mother opted to move Lila to a different school where she gave the teacher very strict instructions on what to look out for with her daughter. As for the rest of Marinette's class? Well, they had found that life wasn't as easy as they remembered it being before Marinette had finally decided she had had enough. It seemed like all the little things were missing and for the first time, they started to realise how much her smile had brightened the day for many of them.

[callioope]

Month after month after month. For seventeen months. Seventeen months of figuring out when I’m going to ovulate. Seventeen months of timing. Of ovulation tests. Of paying way more attention to my body and its symptoms than seems sane. Seventeen times: hope, disappointment. 

I thought by now I’d really figured out my body’s symptoms, but apparently not. I really thought this would be the time. I really thought I knew it, like in my bones, that this was it. You may recall last month posting how I could tell the difference between symptoms. They seemed different this month, they really did.

And we needed a win this month.

I have not talked about this yet, but last month, my father-in-law suffered a heart attack. He was driving with my husband’s stepmom, and fortunately had the ability to pull over in time. But she does not really speak good English, and she had to get out of the car and flag someone down to call 911. It took the emergency responders 8 minutes to get to him, but we have no idea how long it took to place the call in the first place. They say if it takes 10 minutes -- 10 minutes of the heart not pumping blood to the brain -- they declare a person dead upon arrival. 

But it took them 8 minutes, so there was a chance. And that meant 3 weeks in a coma, monitoring brain activity that wasn’t getting better. They were able to treat his heart, and the doctor said he could have survived the heart attack. He did survive the heart attack. He did not survive the brain injury sustained because of the heart attack. 

As my father-in-law is Turkish, the family agreed that he’d want to be buried in Turkey. So my husband flew with his body to Turkey last week to bury him. He had to spend a week there, I think he said that was the minimum in order to get the round trip fare at a reasonable price. And with COVID, the whole idea of him travelling that far has been especially worrying.

He came home last night, but he’s quarantining at our place while I say with my parents in New Jersey. Their home is small and there’s really not a lot of space for me to work, I’m having to sit on a recliner and it’s really hard to feel energized to work. Especially with all the cramps and heartbreak of everything. I should probably just ask for the day off, but there’s an important meeting I need to attend at 1. Maybe I’ll sign off after that, I don’t know...

I just wish I could be with my husband right now. 

Our anniversary is on Tuesday, I was .... I was dreaming of calling him up and telling him we’d finally succeeded. We.... we talked about naming the kid after his dad... if we succeeded....

It feels like it’s never going to happen. It feels like I’m trying so hard for nothing. It feels like I don’t deserve it, it feels like the universe is telling me to give up, that I wouldn’t be a good mother, that I’m not worthy. It feels like something is wrong with my body and every time I talk to the doctor, they don’t seem worried, and well, in the moment, I’m like “herp derp they are a professional I should trust them” but then three -- five -- seventeen months later, I have nothing to show for that trust and a million questions. My friends got bloodwork done when they first started trying so they could address any hormonal roadblocks that could make conceiving more challenging. But my doctor said that wasn’t necessary because “when I get pregnant they’ll do the bloodwork.” 

I want to scream, I feel like you can’t trust medical professionals to catch any red flags. They didn’t take my seriously until the third time I mentioned that my periods are sort of worryingly light every month, when I specifically phrased it “they’re lighter since I came off the pill,” and even then, they just went “Oh? Hmm. Weird.” And didn’t follow up. No, all they said was, “well you got pregnant within a year so you must be fine.” (Miscarried in May, if you didn’t know. And they say that it’s so easy to get pregnant after you miscarrying. That like, most women get pregnant within 3-4 months of miscarrying. Further emphasizing that something is wrong with me and my body.)

I am going to be 33 in January. They say at 35 your chances start to reduce significantly. I worry about this all the time. I worry that I have PCOS and that it’s going to take me two years just to conceive the first time. I worry that the universe wants me to give up, that something is wrong with me physically or mentally, that I just don’t deserve it. I have so many friends who get pregnant immediately after going off the pill, like it’s so easy. We’d dreamed of being parents together, of shared play dates, and their child gets older and older and... 

It just feels like it’s not in the cards. 

I recently (accidentally) read an untagged pregnancy fic where they had trouble conceiving -- a whole whopping 4 months. I remember when 4 months felt like forever. I feel like a fool now, of course, and it made me so angry to see that. They said in that fic that it takes 78 times of having sex to succeed, but I don’t understand that statistic because -- they say most couples conceive with one year, although most conceive within 3-4 months of trying. But they also say that you shouldn’t have sex too frequently because it doesn’t give the sperm enough time to regenerate. (You should wait two days between trying.) Also, there’s really only like 6 days per month worth trying, that’s during your fertility window. But you have to have sex every other day during that 6 day window, so that means 3 times per month for 12 months is only 36 times. 

AT ANY RATE.

YOU SEE. YOU SEE THE MADNESS involved in this process? Every month I pee in a cup and I take a test to see if I’m ovulating yet. And it SUCKS. I HATE IT. I hate doing it. But if I don’t do it, I won’t know when I ovulate, which means I won’t time it right. 

And sex starts to feel like a chore.... and it shouldn’t. It feels like it should just be magical. And it isn’t. 

It’s so hard. It’s so demoralizing. It’s so frustrating to see babies. My mom going on about how fertile her friends are and how they’re having another kid. Hearing that the friend in HS who told me, when I said I wanted to have kids some day, that she “wanted to amount to more than a baby making machine” .... and she just.... immediately got pregnant and here I am. A dream I’ve had, to start a family, a dream that has been mocked, and I’m still waiting. 

I’m so tired.

And I feel guilty because I know that some people have waited even longer.

And I feel scared because I know that some people have waited even longer.

I feel scared with the limited knowledge I have of what the fertility process looks like. I don’t want to have to go to the doctor every other day. But it looks like maybe I’ll have to? At least, eventually?

It’s just heartbreaking. I really needed a break this month, but 2020 continues to be demoralizing. Sometimes it feels like... what am I even doing trying this hard to bring a kid into this world at all. Maybe that’s what the universe is telling me. I certainly had friends in HS who said as much -- that they couldn’t fathom bringing a child into this horrible world -- and that was like, back in the 2000s, before a disaster like 2020 could even be imagined.

Well. Anyways. Thanks for reading my rant. This was cathartic, screaming into the void. 

[deans-baby-momma]

Seeking Mercy-Chapter 2

Back at the Snack and Shack motel/diner, Sam and Mary sit at the tiny round table in room 14 reading police reports and witness accounts while Dean lounges on one of the beds, playing on his phone. 

“Did you think our friendly sheriff was being weird?”

“You caught that too huh?” Dean answers his brother, taking his eyes off his phone to look at the younger man. “She seemed….out of sorts. Like, she has always wanted to meet Mom? We just got Mom back ourselves, so how the hell has Donna ‘always’ wanted to meet her?”

“Maybe she meant, if I hadn’t been killed by Azazel,” Mary suggested, looking between her two sons. “You said you all had gotten pretty close since she was brought into the hunting life, maybe she just meant she’d always wondered what I’d be like.”

With a shrug Mary went back to reading the tome in front of her. Dean and Sam looked at one another, silently questioning if that could be a possibility.

“She acted like she was surprised to see us, though,” Sam brought up. “Like she hadn’t called us to help with this case. I don’t know, things just aren’t adding up.”

An hour passed before they decided it would be best to go and interview the witnesses and get their own recollection of events.

Putting the kids’ down for the night went a whole hell of a lot easier with two people working together than it had been for the past nights. It was a nice change to be able to get Kash to sleep while Adalyn’s dad was getting her bedded down.

I couldn’t wait to join my husband in the bed, even if it was just to cuddle and let him tell me about the case he had been away on. That’s how most of our nights went anyway; after getting the kids bathed and in bed, we would lay together and he would tell me about whatever case he was working on. 

It made me both miss work and glad I could be a stay-at-home mom now. Resigning from Sheriff had been a no-brainer with just one look as Ada’s perfect face. Putting myself in harm’s way was just nutty when I had her to come home to. 

He walks into the bedroom and I watch from my perch at the head of the bed as he goes about disrobing and walking into the ensuite in nothing but a tight pair of blue boxer briefs. I listen as the sink comes on and I can hear him brushing his teeth before the water turns off and he comes back into the room, wiping his mouth on a towel.

“Now that is a sight for sore eyes,” he says as he sees me sitting in bed. I’m wearing nothing special, just an old police academy tee-shirt that has been washed too many times and a pair of sleep shorts. But the way he looks at me makes me feel beautiful; scars and the extra weight from carrying his children be damned.

He quickly joins me in bed, climbing in on his side and immediately takes me into his arms. “Damn, D! I hate being away from you but I love coming home to you.”

“I missed you too, Dean.”

He quickly captures my lips in a kiss and in no time, he is buried deep in the familiar and well-known territory that is his. 

After a rigorous performance we both drift off to sleep, exhausted but satiated. 

“He was just different,” the wife of the third victim says, while dabbing at her eyes. “He wanted things that we never even discussed before.”

“What type of things?” Sam asks, gently as to coax the answers from the distressed girl. 

“Well,” Mrs. Halford, Kimberly, answers. “He didn’t want me anymore,-” her sentence ends in a sob as she grabbed another handful of tissues that Mary offered. “-He was more interested in our downstairs neighbor, Keith.”

“Where is your husband now?” Dean speaks up. This case is just weird and all the cases just result in loose ends.

Kimberly just shrugs and looks out the window. “If I had to guess, he is with Keith.”

“Ma’am, I hate to ask this but,” Dean says, then clears his throat. “Is your husband bisexual?”

“No, not at all. He has always been 100% a man’s man. Chasing after women; well until he caught me, anyway.”

As Sam, Dean and Mary head toward the Impala they discuss the case. 

“So victim #1. Jenny Ventreler. She disappears for a week, comes back only to pack up and leave for the big times according to her mom. Victim #2 George Casseni is missing for a week and comes back to show up for work at a place he has never held a job at before. And now, Kevin Carr is gone for a week and comes back gay? What the fuck is going on here?”

Neither of the three Winchesters have any explanation for any of it; they just look at each other dumbstruck. 

“Let’s get a bite to eat and then hit the books again, I guess.”

“Do you always have food on your mind?”

“Dude, I’m starving! It’s been hours since breakfast.”

“You’re always starving!”

“Shut up bitch!”

“Jerk!”

“Boys! Both of you shut up. Get your asses in the car,” Mary states. “Dean, we will get food to go.”

Back in the motel room, once again Sam and Mary are studying the lore and comparing the witnesses accounts while Dean finishes up his pie and is texting on his phone.

“Guys, look! Mavelin let Y/N pull her hair up into pigtails.” Dean turns the phone toward his family who awws at the picture on the screen; his little girl with two tiny hair bows holding up what little bit of hair she has. He texts his wife back as his brother and mother continue working the case. 

“Guys,” Sam speaks up as he picks up a book. “Did you know that djinn have a cousin?”

“Oh great. Those bastards!” Dean answers with an eyeroll,  but his interest is piqued.

“Yea, according to this, a ‘Fgovalen’ is a distant cousin of djinn. They have almost the same characteristics of djinn except they don’t bleed their victims dry. They put them in a dream-induced coma and feed off of them until they get recharged and then let the victim go.”  Sam quietly reads more of the  mythology of the creatures before he stops and slams the open book onto the table. “Look, they usually drink off the victims for a week. The same amount of time all the people here were missing! I think we are dealing with a ‘Fgovalen’.”

Dean joins his mom and brother at the table and they all delve into the legends of ‘Fgovalen’.

BACK AT THE BUNKER

Caring for a baby who is tired and sleepy but doesn’t want to go to sleep and whines is exhausting! Mavelin struggles around, crying and fussing while I try to rock her to sleep, humming all the songs I can think of; even the ones I know for certain usually puts her out like a light. But this morning, she is fighting it. 

When she finally succumbs, I hold her close and continue rocking her to make sure she is out. I have something important I need to do and I want to do it while I have time to prepare for what I know I am going to find out.

Once Mav is bedded down in her crib, I grab the monitor and head out of the room, shutting the door softly. I head to the bathroom, taking some deep and calming breaths knowing that in less than 15 minutes my life could change drastically.

Opening the cabinet door, I reach into the very back where I know I had hidden the extra pregnancy test from before. Wrapping my hand around the box, I pull it out and stare at it. 

How is this my life? I am married to the best man on Earth, we have the most gorgeous little girl and I am pregnant again with a baby that might belong to his brother! How the hell did I get here?

Tearing open the box, the test stick slides out into my palm. I approach the toilet and pull my pants down, sitting wide-legged over the opening. At first nothing will even come out, not even a trickle. Concentrating on nothing else, I will myself to pee.

Finally, a stream begins and I slip the test end of the stick in it. As soon as it’s done I re-cap the test, place it on the counter and sit the timer on my phone. In less than 5 minutes, I’m either fucked or not. 

‘A watched pot never boils.’ That old adage keeps running through my head as I watch the time on my phone count down. How the fuck has it only been two minutes when it feels like I’ve been in here a lifetime already.

“5, 4, 3, 2, 1.” The loud alarm sounds and I quickly shut it off. It’s now or never. Am I going to find out I’m carrying another baby or is my womb still empty? And if I am, how can I know who the father is? Yes, both Adam and Dean are possibilities. I have slept with them both numerous times since Cas healed Dean. He could very well have impregnated me as much as Adam could have. How the hell would I ever find out? Is there a way to find out?

I flip the test over, and the answer slaps me right in the face. Two blue lines. I’m pregnant again! There is a human growing inside me and I am not 100% who the father is. Fuck my life!

A pregnancy usually means celebrations and joy. When most women find that they are pregnant, they are ecstatic and can’t wait to tell the father. And that’s how it was with Mavelin. When I found out I was pregnant, I cried. I was so happy and I knew Dean would be too. I had even planned out a way to announce it to him. But with this one, I wanted to hide it away and forget about it. But I also knew that wasn’t possible. I had to face this head-on. 

With Dean being away on a hunt, there was only one other person I could hopefully talk to about this. Adam. After sitting on the end of mine and Dean’s bed, gathering my thoughts, I head to the kitchen where I know Adam is.

“Adam,” I say to get his attention. “Can we talk?”

@lostinaseaoffictionalbliss​​ @squirrelnotsam​​ @sandlee44​​  @internationalmusicteacher​​ @kricketc29​ @natura1phenomenon​​ @blacktithe7​​ @spnbaby-67​​ @travelingriversideblues-x​​  @keymology​​ @tftumblin​​ @markofdean79​​ @thevelvetseries​​ @deanwanddamons​​ @winchester-fantasies​ @akshi8278​ @michellethetvaddict​ @larajadeschmidt13​ @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid​ @hoboal87​ @atc74​ @maddiepants​ @delightfullykrispypeach​

[nowhereclosetoit]

Pippa and Theo’s Relationship in “The Goldfinch”

(Or: Why Theo believes he’s in love with Pippa when he’s not)

I really enjoyed writing my last shitshow of an essay so now here’s another overly long essay on Theo and His Issues in “The Goldfinch”.

It’s 3,000 words so...good luck!

Pippa and Theo have a close bond, there’s no doubt about that, however, Theo misconstrues this bond in his head. He ends up perceiving the bond he shares with Pippa, on his end at least, for that of romantic love. Interestingly enough, this is not the case – Theo is not in love with Pippa, despite his belief, and Pippa herself understands this too.

One reason as to why Theo may be mistaking their close relationship (even though it’s never that close really) for romantic love is because of the similarities in each of their childhoods. There are many parallels that can be drawn between each of their childhoods, ranging from the death of a parent or guardian to their shared traumatic experience of the museum bombing.

Pippa’s mother, like Theo’s, is dead, as well as her legal guardian Welty (her uncle), who died in the museum bombing - Already they have some common ground through this which is the only established knowledge they have of each other on their first interaction in Hobie’s flat.

Pippa also stays with an adult (Hobie) who genuinely tries his best to take care of her until, right when things start looking up, another, estranged family member shows up to take her away from New York (Her Aunt Margaret who subsequently takes Pippa to Texas, then sending her to the school in Switzerland for “troubled girls”). This reflects the way that Theo was taken away from the Barbours by his father and Xandra to go and live in Las Vegas.

They are both also physically and/or emotionally abused and scarred from this event:

Theo, through his dad (and Xandra) who neglected him and also physically abused him.

Pippa through her Aunt emotionally manipulating her to make her stay at Institut Mont-Haefeli, and the school themselves for not having her best interests at heart.

In the film, Pippa states whilst at a restaurant after seeing a Glen Gould documentary, that “Welty was only with me that day because I was making him take me to an audition”, depicting her guilt – still as an adult – over the death of her uncle.

Theo makes it clear many times throughout the novel and the film how he feels it was his fault his mother died. (If you want an example check the excerpt above.)

How did they deal with it? Why is this significant in understanding their relationship?

Pippa’s grief manifested itself through her physical injuries which had lifelong lasting effects. Her injuries were extremely severe, reflecting the severity of her grief and guilt. (Hobie in Chapter 4 – Morphine Lollypop: “She’s had a bad crack on the head, a skull fracture, to tell you the truth she was in a coma for a while and her left leg was broken in so many pieces she came near to losing it. ‘Marbles in a sock,’ ” he said, with a mirthless laugh. “That’s what the doctor said when he looked at the x-ray. Twelve breaks. Five surgeries. ”)

Contrastingly, Theo was not as physically affected and internalised everything he felt. This illustrates itself through his lack of eating and sleeping due to his dreams that were plagued with nightmares of the day and his loss of his mother (firstly at the Barbours and also depicted in Vegas) and eventual demise into alcoholism and drug addiction (Vegas + the rest of his life dude’s fuckin popping pills – or crushing the pills then snorting them, I guess).

How Pippa and Theo’s grief manifested itself is significant as it foreshadows the later scenes in the narrative and how they each cope once they’re adults and should no longer be grieving. (I say should no longer be grieving as it’s clear that Theo only really lets go of his grief and guilt once his mother visits him in his dream in Amsterdam after the murder - in the book anyway.) By physically showing her grief to the world – by choice or not – Pippa illustrates a healthier way to deal with grief and negative feelings – getting it out there and receiving help. This also allows us to understand, whilst Pippa also never fully recovers too – See: her crying in the restaurant over the Glen Gould documentary - that she was able to deal with it significantly better than Theo did. She even manages to have a somewhat normal and healthy lifestyle as an adult. As we’ve already discussed, Theo’s grief internalised itself as depicted through his physical injuries/symptoms, or lack thereof. Theo chose, though whether he solely can be fully to blame for this, to internalise his grief and guilt through taking drugs and drinking alcohol. (I personally believe he isn’t fully to blame for ending up addicted to drugs because anybody who cared or was supposed to care about him offered him some form of drug or medication and said it would solve his problems, See: Mrs Barbour – sleeping pills, Xandra and Larry – pills for the plane, Boris – literally any drug they did together over the course of the novel.)

Mini Conclusion (for this part): The ways grief was expressed and dealt/not dealt with by Pippa and Theo explains why they behave the way they do, e.g: Theo internalises everything and never deals with anything fully or properly, Pippa on the other hand is better at reacting to things like an actual person as she was able to deal with her grief and guilt.

Why does Theo believe he is in love with Pippa?

I believe that there are four (4) main reasons as to why Theo mistakes his feelings towards Pippa as romantic love.

1. Pippa is the only remaining link Theo has, bar The Goldfinch, to his mother and before the bombing. He desperately wants to return to before the bombing happened - before his mother was killed. Theo met Pippa only moments before the bombing happened which irrevocably links her to Theo’s “Before: When life was perfect and beautiful” view of his life. This is explored, albeit briefly, in the following excerpts:

With Pippa being depicted in the same way as Theo’s mother, we get the sense that Theo associates her, unconsciously, with his mother, and, consequentially, sees her as a link to his mother, thus feeling no romantic love towards her in anyway.

An example of parallels between Audrey and Pippa is through how both of them had to go and live with an Aunt, with whom they did not have an enjoyable time with, in the South. 

Chapter 4 - Morphine Lollypop: Theo was thinking about “my mother after her parents died and she had to go live with her aunt Bess, + the mention of horses in this excerpt and how "the horses [were] sold”.

2. Theo also links Pippa with helping lessen his grief.

E.g: Soon after he first visits Hobie and Pippa, his appetite starts to return,

Theo relates Pippa to easing his feelings of anxiety:

With Pippa helping Theo ease his grief, whether realised or not, she becomes a caring figure for him, this could relate to a motherly sense of caring – which the novel could suggest so with my previous point, but hey, maybe I’m grasping at straws, idk.

3. Theo’s personality is obsessive and all-consuming which is depicted through literally any relationship he has had with anything and anyone for any considerable amount of time within the novel. 

This is depicted through the obsessive amounts he is able to recount about people and the minute detail in which he does so.

It can also be shown through the act of the years’ worth of letters he wrote to his mother after she died, as well as his relationship with The Goldfinch (obsessed with keeping it as it had a link to his mother and his heart etc).

4. (Again, maybe I’m grasping at straws here) He could be mistaking his love for Pippa as romantic as a result of compulsory heterosexuality (Once again, I’m using compulsory heterosexuality in this case as an LGBTQ+ individual feeling that they have to have romantic feelings/relations to people of the opposite gender/sex, and subconsciously forcing themselves to do so - due to the heteronormative society we live in). This can be found within his romantic relationships with women never fulfilling him and his constant depiction of them as cold (See: Kitsey quotes earlier in essay compared to the way he describes Boris in general) + We all know this motherfucker is queer af, if you don’t believe me check my essay out ;)

In conclusion, I feel like Pippa is able to realise that she is not in love with Theo/differentiate the love they have between them from that of romantic love as she is more aware of her issues and has dealt with them more than Theo has. Pippa managed to remove herself completely from a situation that was causing her pain (New York) and is able to see more clearly from doing so, whereas Theo didn’t. Theo was unable to remove himself mentally or physically and is stuck in the perpetual grief he feels for his mother’s death. The only time we get some sense of closure and complete removal of grief from Theo is after Amsterdam. (In the book this is after the dream he has where he can finally face his mother, and in the film, this is once Boris tells him that “[his] bird is back in the world”). Due to Theo being unable to fully receive any sort of ability to even attempt solving his problems, his judgment is clouded and he believes he is in love with Pippa.

[yeniayofnymeria]

GRRM's Original Outline "What has changed?"

Hello,

Now you all know Martin's letter he wrote in '93. When this letter was written and sent to the editor, the first 13 chapters (200 pages) were already written. In addition, the book consisted of three volumes of the first stage, but as you know, but its 7 volumes now.When we read the letter and the first 5 books, the first comment made was very different and different from the first outline; one or two things remain the same. But is it really? Here I would like to discuss this with you. I think I will go through the events step by step and you will make your own contributions when you read. Let's start!

1. Stark-Lannister war. It's remain, nothing changed.

2. (Dany) Targaryen's 7K invasion with Dothraks. It's still did not happend but we know Dany has Unsullied and some sellswords and next book, she will have Dothraks too. She will linger a little more in essos and then come to the West for the conquer. It's remain too.

3. The Others. GRRM said " Their story will be [sic] heart of my third volume, The Winds of Winter. " It's remain too.

4. Five Main Key Characters (Jon, Arya, Bran, Dany and Tyrion). " In a sense, my trilogy is almost a generational saga, telling the life stories of these five characters, three men and two women. The five key players are Tyrion Lannister, Daenerys Targaryen, and three of the children of Winterfell, Arya, Bran, and the bastard Jon Snow." It's remain too.

5. Fall of the Starks. " Things will get a lot worse for the poor Starks before they get better, I'm afraid. " Yes, indeed it happened.

6. Dead of Robert and long may live new king! "Ned will discover what happened to his friend Jon Arryn... will have an unfortunate accident, and the throne will to brutal Joffrey, still a minor." Yes, it happened too. This substance remained the same too.

7.Sansa and Joffrey. "Sansa Stark wed to Joffrey Baratheon, will bear him a son, the heir to the throne, and when the crunch comes she will choose her husband and child over her parents and siblings, a choice she will later bitterly rue. " Sansa betrays his family anyway but she did not wed Joffrey or bear his son. This substance has changed a bit.

8. Bran's coma and dream and greenseer and dead of Robb. " Young Bran will come out of his coma, after a strange prophetic dream... He will turn to magic, at first in the hope of restoring his legs, but later for its own sake... Robb Stark will die in battle." 

Bran's the same, but Robb's got some change. Robb doesn't die in a war against Joffrey, Jaime and Tyrion. But he really wins a few battles at first (against Tywin. So there's no Tywin in the first place) and then he dies at the Red Wedding.

Bran's in a coma. So Jaime and Cersei are standing exactly. This shows that Jon Arryn's death is due to his learning of the relationship(Jaime-Cersei). So Joff was a bastard in the first outline too. Ned died for the same reason.

Tyrion did not burn Winterfell but fought against Stark army and became Hand of King. Jaime fought against Robb too and lost, was captured. This part is different in some ways, but the same in some ways.

9. Jon Snow, The Wall and Lord Commander. " Jon Snow, the bastard, will remain in the far north. He will mature into a ranger of great daring, and ultimately will succeed his uncle as the commander of the Night's Watch "

Jon goes the wall and will became lord commander but Benjen was lord commander in the first place but it seems he dies anyway or disappear. It's remain.

10. Helping family and Jonarya Love. " When Winterfell burns, Catelyn Stark will be forced to flee north with her son Bran and her daughter Arya. Wounded by Lannister riders, they will seek refuge at the Wall, but the men of the Night's Watch give up their families when they take the black, and Jon and Benjen will not be able to help, to Jon's anguish. It will lead to a bitter estrangement between Jon and Bran. Arya will be more forgiving ... until she realizes, with terror, that she has fallen in love with Jon, who is not only her half-brother but a man of the Night's Watch, sworn to celibacy. Their passion will continue to torment Jon and Arya throughout the trilogy, until the secret of Jon's true parentage is finally revealed in the last book. "

Winterfell is being burned by Greyjoys. Cat is not with Stark children, he is with Robb. Bran and others run away and went to the Wall. But Bran and others did not take refuge in the black brothers. Jon has something to do with Arya again. He wants to protect and save her(FArya). He can't do it because of his vows and he's in a lot of pain... And we know who is Jon's real parents.

Jon and Arya love... It's still too early to say anything about it. When Arya goes to the wall, the love between the two emerges. Arya escaped from KL as in the first outline. But instead of going home, she drifted into her own adventure. Arya has been trying to get home and Jon all along. She'll probably go straight to the wall when she gets back from Braavos. There are so many hints about Jonarya love in books. ( https://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?/topic/125364-jon-arya-hints-and-overall-significance-of-their-relationship-including-part-3/ )

11. Beyond The Wall and Bran-Cat-Arya. "Abandoned by the Night's Watch, Catelyn and her children will find their only hope of safety lies even further north, beyond the Wall, where they fall into the hands of Mance Rayder, the King-beyond-the-Wall, and get a dreadful glimpse of the inhuman others as they attack the wilding encampment. Bran's magic, Arya's sword Needle, and the savagery of their direwolves will help them survive, but their mother Catelyn will die at the hands of the others." This part has undergone significant changes. Despite this, some small parts remained.

Arya is not with them, Cat neither but she dies anyway (and came back but as fire wight not ice wight). Bran never meet Mance(yes, Mance exists) and see others but he sees deads and met Cold Hand(ice wight) and BR and Singers. I guess Rickon is not exists.

Arya has Needle, that's mean Jon gave her it anyway. And direwolves...

12. Dany, Viserys and Drogo. “Over across the narrow sea, Daenerys Targaryen will discover that her new husband, the Dothraki Khal Drogo, has little interest in invading the Seven Kingdoms, much to her brother's frustration. When Viserys presses his claims past the point of tact or wisdom, Khal Drogo will finally grow annoyed and kill him out of hand, eliminating the Targaryen pretender and leaving Daenerys as the last of her line. Danerys [sic] will bide her time, but she will not forget. When the moment is right, she will kill her husband to avenge her brother, and then flee with a trusted friend into the wilderness beyond Vaes Dothrak. " Only 5% of this part has changed.

13. Dragon Eggs and Invasion Plans."There, hunted by [unclear] of her life, she stumbles on a [something about dragon eggs] a young dragon will give Daenerys [unclear] bend [unclear] to her will. Then she begins to plan for her invasion of the Seven Kingdoms." This part has changed 95%.

14. Tyrion's Fate. "Tyrion Lannister will continue to travel, to plot, and to play the game of thrones, finally removing his nephew Joffrey in disgust at the boy king's brutality. Jaime Lannister will follow Joffrey on the throne of the Seven Kingdoms, by the simple expedient of killing everyone ahead of him in the line of succession and blaming his brother Tyrion for the murders. Exiled, Tyrion will change sides, making common cause with the surviving Starks to bring his brother down, and falling helplessly in love with Arya Stark while he's at it. His passion is, alas, unreciprocated, but no less intense for that, and it will lead to a deadly rivalry between Tyrion and Jon Snow."

Yes, it seems this part almost completely changed. But Tyrion has been betrayed by his family in every way(Tysha thing and attempt to kill), just it changed "how it will be" This betrayal caused him to change sides. Only on Targaryen side instead of Stark. But Tyrion will probably be on the Stark side too.

Tyrion is exiled to Essos, not north. Jaime's not the bad guy in the story, Cersei is. Joffrey's dying. In the first Outline, Jaime kills everyone, so Sansa is dead. In the present story, Sansa is still alive and her story continues. They're not named, but probably Joff's siblings are in the first outline and they're dead.

There's no competition between Tyrion and Jon(Arya). It's hard to expect it at this point. We need to wait for the next encounter, but I don't think it will. Unlike the first otline, Jon and Tyrion are good friends. If GRRM designs a love triangle like the first one, maybe they can be enemies. Or maybe he changed the third candidate for that love triangle. (However, if you read Mercy POV, GRRM is waving its hand to this love triangle there.)

In general, the outline / skeleton remains exactly the same, even the characters' motives are more or less the same; there are big changes in a few places, but not so big changes in the remaining parts. Same affliction, betrayal and so on that will ensure the development of the character. Situations occurred in one way or another. It's just that things have gone differently ... but betrayal comes from the family again and (Jon) he's suffering because he can't help the family.

He keeps his end.

GEORGE: […]As I write these last two books, I’ll be moving towards the ending I’ve known since 1991/

“Some major characters — yes, I always had plans, what Tyrion’s arc was gonna be through this, what Arya’s arc was gonna be through this, what JonSnow’s arc is gonna be. ”

...

I don’t want to reveal what I’ve planned for some of these characters, but I’m pretty well on track with most of the major characters. It’s minor characters like Bronn that assume greater importance.”

At Balticon 2016 he said he knows who sits on the Iron Throne at the end.

A year later, in a video interview he continued by saying he has always known the fates of his main characters, who lives or dies, marries who...etc since 1991 when he began writing.

That's all. Thank you for read and sorry again for my bad English. Bye.